A lifetime lost -- Straight Spouse Network Open Forum

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Date Posted: 14:33:56 03/29/17 Wed
Author: Christine (Devastated Christine)
Subject: A lifetime lost

We officially Divorced on October 5th, 2016. He manipulated me in every possible way. I met him at 19. From the moment we started dating, throughout our 30 years together, he lied and cheated the entire time. Self admittedly, sometimes 3 times a week, and I quote "I like them young". We have 3 children. My straight son is so very supportive, he loves his father, but knows his father used and abused me. My twin daughters? One tries desperately to be "Geneva". Her sister is her other half and she will always choose her first. The twin bond...Her Sister has shown no compassion, nor empathy for me. He manipulated her...She screamed at me that he was entitled to half of my pension, but I should be grateful he pays my phone bill. This is the saddest part. I do want them to love their Father! Just truthfully. That treating their Mother like shit, after a lifetime of deceit, is NOT ok. But for my girls, apparently, that's just fine. I gave my husband and my children everything I had. I lost my home, everything I invested, what I believed my relationship to be, and clearly my daughter. TRAGIC does not begin to describe this. After I caught him, he went out of his way to be cruel. While telling his girls he still loves and cares about me. I know I was just a means to and end. He has no regrets because I provided him with a house, a home, a beard, children, an extended family far better to him than his own, and now money in his old age. I firmly believe he stayed because of that money. He he had been brave, told his children the truth, that he's known whom he was since he was 17, but could not face the rejection of his mother, so he lied. That he hurt and betrayed their Mother. That she is hurt and angry, that she has every right to be, and if you as my children are also, I will take responsibility for that. But he is a coward, and frankly, insulting to brave gay men and women everywhere. I recently discovered that he lead people to believe in our area that were involved in an open marriage, that I was doing my own thing. He has reduced my lifetime of devotion and commitment to nothing. No doubt he did that because of some indescreation, and didn't want anyone who knew me to say anything. If you had told me in the end that this is how he would have treated me, I would have believed it impossible. I was wrong. I have only been here to serve his purpose, to provide. Just so broken.

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Replies:

Re: A lifetime lost -- I understand, 18:23:52 03/29/17 Wed
- Re: A lifetime lost -- KatieH (Gaslighting), 13:54:57 03/30/17 Thu
  - Re: A lifetime lost (NT) -- Lake Breeze (I Couldn't Agree With You More), 02:05:57 04/16/17 Sun
Re: A lifetime lost -- Mel (New to Straight Spouses), 17:41:35 04/21/17 Fri