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Date Posted: 21:50:34 06/17/02 Mon
Author: Indri
Subject: Re: All-flavoured Spike! Is All-Purpose Spike too!
In reply to: DeepaD 's message, "All-flavoured Spike!" on 08:42:39 06/13/02 Thu

>I realised, Spike seems to go with everything.

I think also that part of the appeal is that there are many plausible versions of Spike. He's a sufficiently complicated character that an author can pick out just a couple of traits and run with them. He's All-Purpose Spike as well as All-Flavoured.

Consider some versions. There's:

Thoroughly Evil Spike, for those moments when your least favorite Buffyverse characters need to be kidnapped or killed.

The Big Bad, who only thinks he's Thoroughly Evil Spike but in fact couldn't hatch a plan to escape from a paper bag. Usually comic relief.

Drunken Spike (aka LovelornSpike)for pathos, comic relief and occasional bath scenes.

Plot Thickener Spike, who may be any of the other versions of Spike as well, but who will set some plot aspect into motion just because he is bored.

Medical Experiment Spike aka Caged Panther Spike, for all your metaphorical needs about man, nature and different kinds of evil.

Unlikely Romantic Hero Spike for your favourite Spuffyfics.

The Spike You Could Take Home to Mother, because no-one else is asking Joyce for her opinion.

Big Brother Spike, because no-one else is asking Dawn for her opinion.

Stalker Spike, who can be either quite evil, comic relief or an excuse for a sex scene.

Rebellious Abused Child Spike (aka Will), who appears in many Fanged Four fics, costarring Angelus as the evil dad, Darla as an uncaring mum and Drusilla as the adored and incestuous sister.

Abused Spouse Spike

Abusing Spouse Spike, including all Spike/Harmony fic.
Unstoppable Sex Machine Spike

Spike Through History, who wanders through Great Moments of the Twentieth Century like some evil incarnation of Dr Who, hanging out in Prohibition bars and chatting up John Lennon. Sometimes accompanied by his beautiful assistant, Drusilla, but more often than not she's been chained to a bedpost so that Unstoppable Sex Machine Spike can have his way with the locals.

Spike the Speaker of Home Truths aka Dr Ruth Spike
Spike the Wit---he'll even insult Goddesses from the Bitch Dimension for you.

Spike the Author of Godawful Poetry

Spike the Complete Jerk, for those moments when Angel really needs to lose his temper.

Existential Angst Spike, who _does not brood_ but it looks awfully like it.

Redemptionista Spike, because if he can be saved, there's hope for us all.
The Wrong Boyfriend Spike, who rides on his motorcycle wearing too much leather. Shouldn't you be dating that nice grad student instead?

The Englishman Abroad Spike, who will mock the US, munch on his Weetabix and use words like "bint".

Odd Couple Spike, one half of any comedy duo.

Try Hard Spike, who through his (sometimes) selfless and unrewarded actions becomes a metaphor for someone from the wrong side of the tracks trying to make good. Also useful if you want to demonstrate that Person X/Y/Z is an uncaring bitch/bastard who doesn't deserve Try Hard Spike's assistance and/or affection.

And my least favorite version to date, Sir Spike, who owns a castle in England and is very rich because all British people are like that, don't you know?


Well, that's turned into quite a lengthy list, hasn't it? And I'm sure there are more. Football Fan Spike? Will there be post-Cup fics in which Spike chats up David Beckham? He did say he was a fan of Man United...

Indri

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Replies:

[> [> I want to place an order! -- DeepaD, 08:22:39 06/18/02 Tue

rotflmao
*wipes tears and picks self up from floor*
God, Indri, that was hilarious!
He comes in all flavours, he's more versatile than a Swiss army knife, and i hear he only comes in an extra-large size…
I think our catalogue will be a sell-out, don't you?
A few more models -
Spike the sensitive bedwarmer - will comfort you through all those nightmares because, god knows, everyone has nightmares that leave them trembling.

Spike the thermostat - cool as ice against your back in a deliciously wicked way, and then burning heat as he, erm, you know.

Spike the great bisexualiser – guaranteed to turn even the most shrinking lesbian into a wanton hetero sex slut, and convert the most homophobic male into an inveterate slasher.

Spike the brit slang dictionary – for all those words for homosexuals and balls that you never wanted to know
And lets not even get into the adults only models…

Ok, I’d like my Spikebot with batteries included, please.

Deepa D.


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[> [> Re: All-flavoured Spike! Is All-Purpose Spike too! -- Fleisch, 17:07:39 06/18/02 Tue

There's also:

Male Bonding Spike, available for showcasing friendly demons or occasional moments of reluctant camaraderie with Xander

Linguistic Spike (handy for those travel fics or introducing new demon species) -- presumably based on his knowing Fyarl and not on "debasing the beef canoe"

and my personal unfavorite:
Domestic Spike, who has no correlation on the show that I'm aware of (unless you really want to stretch implied bartending abilities) but nevertheless shows up in many fics wearing an apron and cooking


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[> [> [> Re: All-flavoured Spike! Is All-Purpose Spike too! -- Indri, 19:34:34 06/18/02 Tue

>There's also:

>Domestic Spike, who has no correlation on the show
>that I'm aware of (unless you really want to stretch
>implied bartending abilities) but nevertheless shows
>up in many fics wearing an apron and cooking

I like Domestic Spike. A man who can cook is always an asset. So is a man who's not afraid to wear an apron. But I can never work out when Spike might have learnt this skill--certainly not when he was alive. Spike only eats junk food and I don't remember Dru eating anything other than people. He wouldn't have cooked for Harmony. Is he taking culinary night classes on the sly?

I'm afraid I thought of a few more Spikes at work today. I'll list them now and then I'll stop, I promise. There's:

Abandoned Childe Spike

Shotgun Wedding Spike, who has had to fix his hair and get a real job because there's a Little Bad on the way and now he has to help pay for its upkeep and the wedding.

John Constantine Spike, named after the long-coated, blond Londoner of the Hellblazer comics who wanders the mean streets, investigating dark magic, reeking of cigarette smoke and moral ambiguity.

Indri


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