| Subject: Festival Second Section - Pivotal Point NC-17 Slash Tyr/H |
Author:
Brit
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Date Posted: 17:00:37 11/01/02 Fri
Title: Pivotal Point
By: Brit
Rating: NC-17 SM, sex, violence, dark angst
Summary: My entry for the Andromerotica song wheel. "The Masochism Tango"
Fate, Kismet, destino, elmulas, §ã§å§Õ§î§Ò§Ñ. It doesn't matter what species you are or what language you speak. In the life of every sentient being there are certain pivotal points that depending on how you react to them can change your life forever. The decision that you make can literally mean the difference between life and death.
I've had lots of these moments in my short life. I've never been one to ask "what if"? A sickly, scrawny little mudfoot doesn't have the luxury of speculation. I did what was needed to ensure the survival of Seamus Z Harper. I did a lot of things that in retrospect I wouldn't have done shouldn't have done. I have lives on my conscience, people who should never have died. People whose fate crossed with mine at one of those pivotal moments.
My fate was sealed the day he walked on board Andromeda. He stood there, big, dark and brooding. He was everything that I'm not. I felt rather than heard Beka gasp. Now I gotta explain a few things. Beka and I had been fucking on and off - little intentional pun there - ever since she'd got rid of that loser Bobby. She's one of those women that need a man at regular intervals and I was available. Oh boy was I available. It was like Christmas and my birthday had come all at the same time. My sexual encounters up to then had been fumbled, unsatisfactory copulation in dirty alleyways and even dirtier rooms. Beka changed that, I will be eternally grateful for what she taught me. She enjoyed it too, she's a screamer our Beka. Sadly the names she screamed weren't always mine. But what the Hell I was the one making her scream.
Anyhow I digress; you don't want to hear about my sorry sexual history. Well the minute Beka set eyes on the big Nietzschean I knew that she wasn't going to want me anymore. Maybe the odd quickie for old times sake but regular sex, not a chance.
I decided that I didn't like Tyr Anasazi. It was never likely was it? He was an uber and I'd had too many run ins with the Dragans to ever trust a Niet, no matter what pride he belonged to. He fascinated me though.
I was being particularly hyper one day, practically bouncing off the walls. I'd managed to track down a very obscure little fault in the slipstream drive and I was feeling good. I hadn't slept for 24 hours, kept going with Sparky and coffee and OK I was annoying. Hell, annoying is one of the things I do best. I was in mid flow with the 'freakin genius' and I am a God' act when I noticed him looking at me. He was standing with his arms crossed, muscles bulging in his biceps and lower arm. He gave me that little smile and my blood literally ran cold.
I decided it might be a good idea to disappear into one of the machine shops for a while. I hadn't counted on him following me. He caught up with me at the door to my refuge. He grabbed me by the back of my shirt and lifted me clean off my feet. He spun me round and slammed me back against the metal bulkhead. His face was so close to mine. Tyr stared into my eyes; it was as if he was looking for something.
"Open the door, boy and engage privacy controls." I just knew from the tone of his voice that I was in for a beating. I guessed he wouldn't actually kill me, the ship needed an engineer after all to ensure the crew's survival and I was very certain that Tyr Anasazi wouldn't put his own life in jeopardy. I decided just to give in; it would be over quicker that way. I'd learnt that lesson age 10, the first time I'd been caught by the Dragans.
He pushed me into the machine shop and I locked the door and requested privacy from Andromeda. "Strip." He growled. I looked at him totally uncomprehending. He backhanded me across the face. "Do as you're told, or I will do it for you." What choice did I have? Well you may say I had plenty of choice, it was one of those moments when you make an instant decision. I made my decision, I stripped. I stood in front of him shivering. He hit me again, this time in the stomach. I doubled over coughing and retching. Why didn't I fight back? I honestly thought he would hurt me even more if I did. He kicked my feet from under me and I landed up on my back on the floor. He stood over me. I couldn't help notice that he had an enormous erection straining the front of his pants. Despite myself I could feel myself getting aroused too. He couldn't fail to notice that, I was naked after all. "Are you enjoying this, Kludge?" I shook my head. "Liar." This time he kicked me. Instinctively I curled up into a ball. He grabbed me by my hair and dragged me to my knees. "Are you enjoying it?" He asked me again. This time I nodded. I was enjoying it; the pain was turning me on to an extent that I'd never known before. He laughed twisting the fingers of one hand into my hair. Then with a movement so quick that I didn't have time to react he broke my arm. I heard the bones break with a sickening crack; the pain was the worst so far. I could feel blackness engulfing me, I heard myself scream, the sound far off and unreal. Then I passed out.
I came to cradled in warm arms. My first thought was that Beka had found me. I looked up and saw his face. His expression was compassionate. He smiled when I opened my eyes. It hurt to move but there was a sweetness about the pain that I'd never experienced before. His hands and mouth were all over my body; I was as aroused as I'd ever been with a woman, maybe more so. I remember thinking how perverted it all was, and then he found my erection and began very skilfully to bring me to orgasm. I couldn't think coherently after that. He guided my uninjured hand down to his own engorged penis. I'd never done that to another man before, but I guessed it would be just the same as going solo and I don't think I made a bad job of it. He howled like a wolf when he came.
Afterwards it was as if nothing had happened. "You had better go to the medical deck and have those injuries fixed. It was a bad fall you took." With those words he left me to clean myself up and get dressed.
He ignored me for a month. I was just about ready to explode with frustration when he took me again. He was careful not to injure me in the same way that time. This time he covered me in bruises then made me kneel and take him in my mouth.
All our encounters followed a similar pattern; he beat me, then loved me and finally ignored me. I think Trance was suspicious of all the falls and knocks that I seemed to be taking I caught her looking at me with a calculating expression on her face. That was the time he bruised my kidneys. I peed blood for a week after that. I couldn't stop having sex with him though, he was like a drug, and like any addictive substance I knew that one day he would probably kill me.
I suppose the worst thing was that Beka took to confiding in me. After trying to subtly attract Tyr she had blatantly tried to seduce him and he'd turned her down. She couldn't understand it. She speculated that he was getting it from somewhere else. Trance, maybe or Rommie, perhaps even Dylan. She never once thought of me being the recipient of Tyr's superior genetic material. She gave up trying after a while and turned her attention to Dylan, I think she was more successful with him, she never confided in me again so I don't know.
You remember what I told you at the beginning of this conversation about pivotal moments in life. Decisions taken or not taken, the thin line between living and dying. The day Tyr Anasazi decided to take me for the first time was one of those moments for him and I suppose by association for me. If he hadn't followed me to the machine shop he would still be alive and I wouldn't be on trial for his murder. The moment he walked through that door he sealed his fate.
The mistake he made was to tell me it was all over. We'd just had sex and I was waiting for him to leave when he spoke to me. "That was the last time boy, it's over. I am to be married and once that happens I will be expected to give up any little indulgences that I may have."
He looked straight into my eyes, his deep brown eyes locked with mine.
"Your eyes cast a spell that bewitches, Tyr. You've enslaved me. I need you to give me the pain that I desire more than anything." I was practically grovelling as I spoke.
He shrugged. "It is over boy, accept it, find someone else to hurt you, I can no longer service you."
I was distraught, I begged and pleaded with him, to my disgust I even cried. He turned his back on me. That was when I picked up the nano-welder and plunged it into him. A lucky blow, straight into his heart. He died before he realised what was happening. At least it was quick for him. I'm the one who's suffering.
Well that's my story, still want to defend me? I got up and paced the cell. Four paces by four paces the boundaries of the rest of my life. Fate, Kismet, whatever?
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