| Subject: Re: Comfort for Rekeeb (NC17) |
Author:
tZen
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Date Posted: 13:33:39 08/20/02 Tue
In reply to:
maryavatar
's message, "Comfort for Rekeeb (NC17)" on 06:22:42 08/18/02 Sun
You made a not-harsh but harder than Purple Gold Trance. Believable, likeable, whch she definitely wasn't in any eppy I've seen. She's ony been likeable when bits of Purple shined through, like her *hic*, closing Harper's jaw, and saying victorious casino slang... it's always been bits of Purple impishness shining through, or her tender memory of Beka in Mayflies. I've never seen a Gold Trance I truly more than tolerated until now.
sabotaged seems an in-character word for Rekeeb to say
I also never cared about Rekeeb.. always the secondary for Hohne. Here, in a short scene, you also make him someone I care about. I am as surprised as Trance.
I love the simple spinning light, the careful to maintain eye contact.. it can be very important in strong emotional and physical sensations and is an extension of what Miss Perception is doing here,
"She smiled as she found what she needed" Hm?
"Once again Trance mourned the loss of her tail." It's a sexual idea, but brings sadness and a smile to my face.. usually when I think of Trance as a sexual creature, gentleness I do not go for, but you have made a story gentle *and* attractive...
"disturbingly large penis" :)
"suddenly engulfed in soft, suctioning heat" My mouth is watering.. damn Pavlov.. :)
Trance is using her ability to ease someone's deep emotional pain, as Spock did for Kirk by making him forget his love for Rayna in Requiem...
Though it's also for Trance's pleasure as well.. her awareness.. your description of their mammalian reproductive process, exotic but still...
"The pleasurable ache..." mmmm "...almost unbearable...she moved slowly and carefully towards her goal." oooooer... "between Trance's legs..."
"Trance snapped back into her body and screamed"
"Pleasure slammed through Trance leaving her limp and weak and lying sprawled"... pupils dilating :)
"wiped him down with her leggings" ?
* tZen cries happily at the coda of the story. Uterrly beautiful, mary... Utterly beautiful. An instance where a lie is the most beautiful truth.
* tZen lets the emotion wash over him. Trance not only as caretaker, as gentle giver, but also endowing a true gift unto Rekeeb and the universe.. to in some small way make up for what she did to Hohne. It is not the truth.. but it is Trance.. it is Gold Trance.. Thank you mary for writing this.
tZen
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