Hello from Boston! -- Speak Up...I Can't Hear You!

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Subject: Hello from Boston!

Author:
A Beaten Man

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Date Posted: 11:03:26 07/16/09 Thu

Dear Diary
The girls continue to visit so I apologize I haven't had time to write. The perception of having three ladies come stay at my place as hit a small roadblock called REALITY. Sadly I'm a fluttering image of my former masculine self. I'm actually taking a break from perusing the latest edition of "Access Hollywood" magazine just to write this. If you need any updates on the latest social escapades of the Jonas Brothers you can now just ask me.
My self-esteem has been challenged greatly by these new visitors. Every night I emerge from my room after getting dressed to go out and am told to return because "my outfit doesn't coordinate" This process repeats itself mercifully with no end. The shaking of their collective heads has replaced the need for words as my cue to return from where I came. (I swear sometimes they don��t even look up)
On another note I no longer have access to my own bathroom. I've had to set up a little pot out behind the shed. On Tuesday Sarah actually went into the bathroom to get ready and when she finally came out.....it was Wednesday. When I actually am able to get into my shower for a second I'm unable to locate my favorite shampoo amongst the hundreds of bottles of lotions and hair products. The doctor says my burns from tripping over the curling irons are minor and should heal just fine.
Sleeping arrangements have also become an issue. Somehow it went from "no problem we'll be fine sleeping on the floor" to the reality of the three girls sleeping on my expensive foam bed and me being regulated to the air mattress (which can't seem to stay inflated for more than five minutes) And that's only if I'm lucky enough to get them to bed before 2am and get rid of their new ��male friends�� that they seem to collect easily from the local bars.
By the way my whole experiment of living a life without a TV is over as the girls have purchased one and now reruns of "The Hills" and "John and Kate" are being played over and over. Also my relaxing yoga music has been deleted from my computer and replaced with every Justin Timberlake song you could think of.
Not to worry the intensity of my rising stress level is helped slightly by my new smoking habit. A habit which is surprisingly convenient considering the girls' constant trips to the corner store for "wine and butts" Kate has single-handedly raised the stock price of all wine corporations in America.
Anyway whoever said life is short clearly didn't have these three over for a week. I must go now the three hairdryers being used in unison have shorted a fuse........Rebecca sends her love

P.S. Thanks for the birthday wishes. I will try to post more. I hope to see you all soon. Maybe real soon if I follow through with my threats of driving them home personally��

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Replies:

Subject	Author	Date
Re: Hello from Boston!	Mom	08:42:25 07/21/09 Tue