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Date Posted: 11:33:56 07/14/11 Thu
Author: Donna Ray '51
Subject: Re: Where is everyone?
In reply to: Donna Ray '51 's message, "Re: Where is everyone?" on 11:15:57 07/14/11 Thu

I'm telling you, they have nothing else to do in Indiana but send me jokes!




After Quasimodo's death, the bishop of the Cathedral of Notre Dame sent word through the streets of Paris that a new bell ringer was needed.

The bishop decided that he would conduct the interviews personally and went up into the belfry to begin the screening process.

After observing several applicants demonstrate their skills, he had decided to call it a day.

Just then, an armless man approached him and announced that he was there to apply for the bell ringer's job. The bishop was incredulous.

'You have no arms !'

'No matter,' said the man. 'Observe !'

And he began striking the bells with his face, producing a beautiful melody on the carillon.

The bishop listened in astonishment; convinced he had finally found a replacement for Quasimodo.

But suddenly, as he rushed forward to strike the bell, the armless man tripped and plunged headlong out of the belfry window to his death in the street below.

The stunned bishop rushed down two hundred and ninety five church steps, when he reached the street, a crowd had gathered around the fallen figure, drawn by the beautiful music they had heard only moment before.

As they silently parted to let the bishop through, one of them asked, 'Bishop, who was this man ?'.

'I don't know his name,' the bishop sadly replied,
'BUT HIS FACE RINGS A BELL'


WAIT ! WAIT ! There's more


The following day, despite the sadness that weighed heavily on his heart due to the unfortunate death of the armless campanologist, the bishop continued his interviews for the bell ringer of Notre Dame.

The first man to approach him said, 'Your Excellency, I am the brother of the poor armless wretch that fell to his death from this very belfry yesterday.

I pray that you honor his life by allowing me to replace him in this duty.'

The bishop agreed to give the man an audition, and, as the armless man's brother stooped to pick up a mallet to strike the first bell, he groaned, clutched at his chest, twirled around, and died on the spot.

Two monks, hearing the bishop's cries of grief at this second tragedy, rushed up the stairs to his side.

'What has happened ? Who is this man ?' the first monk asked breathlessly.

'I don't know his name,' sighed the distraught bishop, 'but...'

(. . . Wait for
it ...)


'HE'S A DEAD RINGER FOR HIS BROTHER.'

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Replies:

[> [> [> [> Re: Where is everyone? -- Warren Byerly '56, 18:42:09 07/15/11 Fri

Hey Donna I guess it is just you and I with the jokes. I had to laugh at the naked cowboy. Guess no one else knows any funny stuff.
Just came back from Chicago and on my way through Indy I cut off at the Rural Street exit and took Rural to 10th Street which is near where I grew up. Sure has changed since the 50's. Lots of boarded up buildings and houses. Went down Michigan and past Tech and looks like some building going on. Glad to see Tech surviving in these days of slash and burn. Went to Shirpiros (sp) for my favorite Corn Beef on Rye. Been a long time.


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[> [> [> [> [> Re: Where is everyone? -- Donna Ray '51, 08:10:09 07/18/11 Mon

Hi Warren,

Glad you like the "blond cowboy" - my niece sure did, she sent it to me. Thought some might object to it.

My husband, Clayton (class of 1951 with me) lived on 17th St just off Rural, so I know that area fairly well. I'm from Dorman St, off Michigan. Growing up I never knew how close we were to downtown; I didn't even know it existed - just me and two blocks was all there was, and of course the drugstore.

Hey, am I going to win the prize for these jokes? (don't even drink, boo hoo). I think everyone else is on Facebook or Twitter (is that the other one?) I don't have a computer, don't want one, and do my husband's typing here at public libary.

Where do you live?
We live in Virginia, Stafford County, out in the country, well sort of, at least our place is pretty secluded.

I have another joke but can't seem to send it. My niece sent it to me as a video, I told her that wouldn't do so she then sent it as an attachment but that seems difficult to copy. Will work on it; it's pretty good.


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[> [> [> [> [> [> Re: Where is everyone? -- Fred 64, 07:54:20 07/23/11 Sat

A Bus on a busy street struck a Catholic man.

He was lying near death on the sidewalk as a crowd gathered.

"A priest. Somebody get me a priest!" the man gasped.

Long seconds dragged on but no one stepped out of the crowd.

A policeman checked the crowd and finally yelled, "A PRIEST, PLEASE! Isn't there a priest in this crowd to give this man his
last rites?"

Finally, out of the crowd stepped a little old Jewish man in his 80s.

"Mr. Policeman," said the man, "I'm not a priest. I'm not even a Christian. But for 50 years now, I'm living behind the Catholic
Church on Second Avenue , and every night I'm overhearing their services. I can recall a lot of it, and maybe I can be of some comfort to this poor man."

The Policeman agreed, and cleared the crowd so the man could get through to where the injured man lay.

The old Jewish man knelt down, leaned over the man and said in a solemn voice:

B-5 .... I-19 ... N-38 ... G-54 .... O-72


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