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Date Posted:18:16:20 09/18/07 Tue In reply to:
Hulalea
's message, "Re: Just checking in - miss everyone" on 01:15:42 09/08/07 Sat
Thanks Hula I will definitely tell Doug to shoot you an email or something. Last time I talked to him he said he was kind of staying away because he kind of got burnt on it or something to that effect. I haven't talked to him since that last post. I have called him a couple times but havent gotten through. Thanks for lifting me up. I do ok sometimes and then other times I am really down. My son's drinking is a big thing for me now. Whenever I leave the house I wonder what I am going to come home to. Be it more burns on the couch or knife holes in the wall or who knows what. I am literally afraid to leave the house for fear of what him and his friends are going to do when I am gone. I obviously have to leave at times because I work. And I work nights. So those kind of things kind of amplify her absence. Not that she was that big of a restraint to him but somewhat of one. yeah I would like to think that I deserve much better than what I got but I guess that is what I have for now and Iam dtermined to try to move on and not roll over and die. I just have to get tougher with my kid. He is on probation and can be sent back to juvenile jail at any time. In fact he just did another five days. And then proceed to get drunk and butn the couch more the same night he got out. Co dependency all over again but with my kid instead of my wife. A whole different thing. It makes me appreciate and relate to all the parents on this board.
Anyway thanks again and Love to you.
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