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Date Posted: 00:15:33 05/15/01 Tue
Author: Holland
Subject: what is this

What is this
What is this I feel
I know what its suppose to be
But to me I cant feel that way
Is it really what is going on inside me
Or am a victim of my own game
Is this a game that im playing with myself
Or this reality that I cant bear to grasp
Uncontrolled intensity rules the desire
Desire drives the thoughts that drive me
But the desire to not be drived by these thoughts
Puts me here
Lost a drift my own sea of emotion
The need to fill this empty feeling
Is my only oar
Searching inside I try to discover what it is I want
What it is I need
Objective thinking and levelheaded friends are my onlys potlight
Shedding light on eternal darkness
I don’t want eternal darkness
I cant live in darkness
Im scared of darkness and all that it represents
This fear and this want are the same
Im being driven to find how out how to open the door
This eternal darkness is simply my mind
Somewhere there is an opening and on the other side
The son,
this is where there hope and light
where all darkness is converted to good
and this is where I want to be
I strive to be
I cannot be

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