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Date Posted: 15:12:04 06/20/04 Sun
Author: Raphaela
Author Host/IP: NoHost / 80.45.178.21
Subject: Re: untitled
In reply to: Jjaz 's message, "untitled" on 20:02:32 05/17/04 Mon

The regular rhythm and rhyme helps the poem to flow. Yet, not certain it is true to your style, if that makes sense. The last stanza also invites the reader to ponder that thought

'Better to live in delusion
Than trouble myself to death'

and perhaps contemplate the alternative of being true to oneself.

Just rambling here - good when poems make us reflect eh?

S x




>I often wake with a troubled mind
>for troubles that come my way
>Perhaps they will pass in time
>When present in the light of day
>
>An uneasy feeling, I find them all
>As one by one they came
>I tried to count them, I recall
>Yet they numbered all the same
>
>Too many, does one man carry,
>Too few are ever resolved
>For life can make us wary
>When we become involved
>
>I would never purchase them
>Nor ask for them for free
>Yet they seem to know where I am
>And proceed to trouble me
>
>So, I have come to one conclusion
>I conclude with every breath
>Better to live in delusion
>Than trouble myself to death

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