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Date Posted: 01:24:55 07/30/02 Tue
Author: Gray Squirrel
Author Host/IP: 0-1pool27-16.nas52.stockton1.ca.us.da.qwest.net / 65.147.27.16
Subject: Idiot on Ice

Idiot on Ice

I found everyone's sadness today.
It was a little overwhelming, so
I had to let it go,
But this isn't about that.

Ever meet anyone newly in love?
That dreamy feeling, and it's
Sad to see it go, like a drug,
Isn't it? Some of them even
Look guilty, poor things.

No, not the same thing,
I wouldn't think.
The sadness I meant was
A sadness against shadows.
Visions of dreams
Circumvented by chance,
And people's choices.

Each individual,
Each specific...
She's treated like sex,
He's treated like stupidity,
She's treated like fat,
She's treated with inspection...
No one ever really
Wants to know the thoughts, or
Anything, inside.

This wasn't supposed to
Be about that.
I meant to let it go.
Chance makes life incredible,
That's why it isn't fair...

I stopped talking to her again,
Maybe a month or two ago,
Stopped saying "you" just now,
Said "her" instead, but
That doesn't matter, either.
I always miss her.

We were newly in love
About a decade ago,
And this would be sad enough,
If the feeling had
Grown cold over time, but...

I haven't stopped swooning,
Silly children we are,
Haven't stopped that dreamy look,
It's always on...
I'm not sure how that happened,
And it's constantly incredible,
Overwhelming.

Even though I told her
To go fuck herself.
Surprise ending.

-Gray Squirrel

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