Subject:  Where is everyone? |
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No one
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Date Posted: 12:48:50 02/01/01 Thu
Just stopping in for a second, I heard some news from Scooby-Goo, she has found a large box and is working on mailing herself to the DailyGoo,(her family didn't understand anything anyway!! WHATEVER!!) we need to wish her luck, she has her camera with her (as well as a dozen or so of those crime scene bags) so maybe we will be getting some stuff to pick over! Where is everyone else? Nice to see Stephan's Bitch here! I love you girl! Honalu Goo, as long as the Goo's are attractive and in the music business there will always be stupid fans around, so don't you worry your pretty little head. Over the years I have collected a few things and kept them, some of them funny and some of them completely idiotic. Now on the idiotic ones, I am gonna have to change the names so I can share them!!LOL!! But here is a funny one that I ran across about a year and a half ago. If you have anything you found particulary interesting you may share it too, you must change the names to protect the idiots!!LOL!! But I am sure we can all guess who it might be!!
Love you guys!! *wink wink*
No one
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On 9/08/99 14:30 Ineedacigarette wrote:
> Yes, we've all heard that John Rzeznik has slept with so many women since last Tuesday that his penis is demanding hazard pay. And his teeth are bigger and whiter than Bill Clinton's ass in January. Blah, blah, blah. While all of you are fixated on him, you're missing out on the real Romeo of the group: Mike Malinin.
Has anyone ever stopped to wonder why Mike rarely speaks, why he avoids the spotlight? Reticence, you say? Wide-eyed innocence? Naive people...that's what he wants you to think. That shy guy routine is just a ruse, a mammoth conspiracy more cunning than anything that ever crawled out of Area 51.
The truth is that Mike Malinin leads a life of such wanton debauchery that even Charlie Sheen stands in awe. Young, old, short, tall, nurse or nun, no woman is immune to the charms of this lusty musician.
How does he do it? Is it the smile? The bashful way he bows his head whenever a camera points at him? Courtly Texas manners? Hardly. Over the years, Mike has crafted a list of pick-up lines so potent that even Melissa Etheridge is rumored to have once crossed the border into Mikeville.
Remember, ladies, forewarned is forearmed. You, too, may one day find yourself face to face with this rock n roll Lothario. Don't let him use these lines on you.
Mike Malinin's Top 11 Pick-Up Lines:
11. Did you know that drummers have the biggest sticks?
10. You look hotter than Lars Urlich in a tube top.
9. Want to help me polish my kit?
8. Sure, Rzeznik is cute, but I've got 2 words for you: premature ejaculator.
7. Has anyone ever told you that you've got beautiful bongos?
6. You up for a little rim shot?
5. Baby, I'm no talk, all action.
4. Once you go percussion, girl, you'll never go back.
3. Ever had a man clang your cymbals?
2. They call me 'A Boy Named Good.'
1. Sweetheart, drums aren't the only thing I can bang all night
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