Create a New Forum Admin Login Member Login Contribute to Voyager Search VoyForums Help Desk VoyForums Exchange VoyForums Directory/Categories VoyForums Homepage VoyForums News FAQ - Frequently Asked Questions

[ Show ]

Support VoyForums

[ Shrink ]

VoyForums Announcement: Programming and providing support for this service has been a labor of love since 1997. We are one of the few services online who values our users' privacy, and have never sold your information. We have even fought hard to defend your privacy in legal cases; however, we've done it with almost no financial support -- paying out of pocket to continue providing the service. Due to the issues imposed on us by advertisers, we also stopped hosting most ads on the forums many years ago. We hope you appreciate our efforts.

Show your support by donating any amount. (Note: We are still technically a for-profit company, so your contribution is not tax-deductible.) PayPal Acct: Feedback:

Donate to VoyForums (PayPal):

[ Login ] [ Contact Forum Admin ] [ Main index ] [ Post a new message ] [ Search | Check update time | Archives: 1, [2] ]

Subject: ?????? Author: Zach Klein [ Next Thread | Previous Thread | Next Message | Previous Message ] Date Posted: 22:41:57 03/27/03 Thu Yeah, just stick it up there! Understanding the do’s and don’ts of sexual conduct can be a confusing and literally sticky situation. Here are some tips to keep you in line in the bedroom: 1.)NUMBER ONE! The first useful tip I can give is leave the ass alone. Do you go digging around in Porto-potty? HELL NO! So why in the fuck would you stick your finger in an ass let alone stick your favorite man part in the stick center. If you are really curious go to taco bell eat about six burritos, let it all flow into the pooper, out of the bad end, and just stick your fucking head in there. Now how’s that? Fun? Of course not! So why would you subject your one eyed miner to that sort of torture. 2.)NUMBER TWO. What is this male obsession with coming on tits and face? I know that for a fact you get that shit on your hand and you can’t move your fat little ass fast enough to the bathroom to clean it off. And that’s just on your hand! Multiply that about by about 10 and then rub it all around your face and chest. I think that in Singapore you get killed for that shit, so why would you do it to a girl? 3.)NUMBER THREE! Lick the clit. That’s what feels good, so do it! There is no need for this making out with the vagina or this shoving your nose in there. I don’t even know how that got started. It must be something to do with Jews! 4.)NUMBER FOUR! Oh, this is good; my friend Andy does it to lots of girls, after sex makes them sleep on the floor. (Brinnie84). OK? That dude is just fucked up! 5.)NUMBER FIVE! Shit, vomit, food, etc. These items are not welcome in the bedroom! Thing that you would find in a hospital dumpster have no business being in your house let alone the Lovin’ Quarters. If you are at all questioning if these things would be right for you I can do you a favor. Come to my house with some vodka, I will cover your gross ass with the vilest things I can conjure in my lower areas. I will then end the session with a swift kick to the balls and send you on your way. Unfortunately, I can think of no more things that irritate me about sexual actions. If you have any comments or questions please feel free to e-mail me at Zach@FUCKYOU.com LIKE A FOX! [ Next Thread | Previous Thread | Next Message | Previous Message ]