Re: 再修改反而不好了 --

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Date Posted: 20:41:48 09/14/02 Sat
Author: 又有微言
Subject: Re: 再修改反而不好了
In reply to: 文津 's message, ""飄若紙"不好,故再修改" on 19:47:56 09/14/02 Sat

>>>秋至徑幽幽
>>>浪盪韆鞦
>>>殘荷不禁冷風颼
>>>朱戶紗簾飄若夢
>>>有美懷愁
>>>
>>>素臉眼波流
>>>落淚無由
>>>雕闌玉砌盡階囚
>>>恨與鵬鵰飛碧海
>>>傲視神州

@@此次修改反而不妙了, 因前面的幽幽/殘荷/若夢/素臉/落淚皆應有美懷愁, 此番修改的鵬鵰/傲視就完全不合邏輯了, 反而是下望漁舟句更合一些, 但長鷹也不好. 或者你去海邊地方看看, 近日多雨,應有鷗鷺低旋, 可能你會找到更妙意境.

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Replies:

解釋為何修改 -- 文津, 22:02:40 09/15/02 Sun
- 但是無法由銜接, 無論寫實或寫虛, 都應該關聯, 天馬行空也要有可行之空. -- 微之言, 23:00:25 09/15/02 Sun
  - 再解釋 -- 文津, 22:26:06 09/16/02 Mon
    - 原來如此! 因此也就成了不普通的不倫類了. -- 再微言, 23:25:05 09/16/02 Mon
      - 你可以問問社長,看看我的說法對不對? (NT) -- 文津, 22:43:23 09/17/02 Tue
        對不起，遲了回覆，另起一筆不是不可，但必須以前文作足夠鋪墊 (NT) -- 社長, 21:36:06 09/21/02 Sat
        但必須以前文作足夠鋪墊－－還是社長說得好！ (NT) -- 微言over, 22:45:40 09/22/02 Sun

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