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Date Posted: 01:48:52 05/21/03 Wed
Author: Kevin
Subject: Re: something new
In reply to: rob 's message, "Re: something new" on 14:39:02 05/20/03 Tue

Something just makes me go a little psycho when i'm in front of a computer. I am retarded individual who desperately needs psychiatric assistance. People on here make me so paranoid and mentally unstable that i just lash out indiscriminately without regard for the consequences, believing everything someone writes is a personal attack on me. This is because i am indeed a very nervous insecure individual, rather than one that has encountered physical or sexual abuse. I think the cause for a lot of my distress is quite simply loneliness and the need to belong and to be loved. Being so far away from family and living alone has had a very profound effect on me. I behave quite normally in social situations when there are lots of people around me, it's just being so alone that fucks me up.

I don't mean to hurt anyone it's just that i need to release the pressure in my brain before it blows up. Penting up emotion is more damaging in the long term so this is why i erupt every so often.

Harry, I don't have a band so therefore my band can't be the worst in Hull!! You just sounded worse that a strangled cat on that sampler - sorry man but it's true! Like i said your last gig at the Adelphi was much better than anything previous but you need to get singing lessons.

Anyway i'm gonna pack myself off to rehab now so i'll probably be absent from here for a few days just till i sort myself out.

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