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Date Posted: 00:49:50 01/28/03 Tue
Author: Cesquios~~~~~The Breakfast treat
Author Host/IP: 209.179.146.43
Subject: Some Jokes for you guys!

Here you guys go...we can all use a laugh.

Born Again

> > A couple made a deal that whoever died first would come back

> and inform the other of the afterlife. Their biggest fear was

> that there was no heaven.

> >

> > After a long life, the husband was the first to go, and true

> to his word, he made contact. "Mary...Mary...."

> >

> > "Is that you, Fred?"

> >

> > "Yes, I've come back like we agreed."

> >

> > "What's it like?"

> >

> > "Well, I get up in the morning, I have sex. I have breakfast,

> I have sex. I bathe in the sun, and then I have sex twice. I

> have lunch, then sex pretty much all afternoon. After supper,

> I have sex until late at night. The next day it starts again."

> >

> > "Oh, Fred you surely must be in heaven."

> >

> > "Not exactly -- I'm a rabbit in Kansas."

Pepsi
Tiz will love this one

Pfizer Corp. is making the announcement today that VIAGRA will soon be available in liquid form and will be marketed by Pepsi Cola as a power beverage - suitable for use as a mixer.


Pepsi's proposed ad campaign claims:


It will now be possible for a man to literally pour himself a stiff one.

Obviously we can no longer call this a soft drink. This additive gives new meaning to the names of cocktails, highballs and just a good old fashioned stiff drink.

Pepsi will market the new concoction by the name of Mount And Do


The last and funniest...

Nun

A cabby picks up a nun. She gets into the cab and the driver won't stop staring at her in the rear view mirror.

She asks him why he is staring and he replies, "I have a question to ask you, but I don't want to offend you."

She answers, "My dear son, you cannot offend me. When you're as old as I am and have been a nun as long as I have, you get a chance to see and hear just about everything. I'm sure that there's nothing you could say that I would find offensive."

"Well, I've always had a fantasy to kiss a nun."

She responds, "Well, let's see what we can do about that:
1. You have to promise you are single and
2. You must be Catholic."

The cab driver is very excited and says, "Yes, I am single and I'm Catholic too!"

"OK", the nun says, "Pull into the next alley"

He does and the nun fulfills his fantasy with a kiss that would make a hooker blush.

But when they get back on the road, the cab driver starts crying.

"My dear child, said the nun, Why are you crying?"

"Forgive me sister, but I have sinned. I lied, I must confess, "I'm married and I'm Jewish."

The nun says, "That's OK, my name is Kevin and I'm on my way to the Mardi Gras."

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Replies:

[> ROFL I loved the first one most -- Alina, 03:46:55 01/28/03 Tue (172.186.177.83)

Thanks for posting these Ces! Loved em!


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