Was so depressed -- Add YourTestimony

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Date Posted: 05:35:39 06/02/03 Mon
Author: Annette
Subject: Was so depressed

I grew up in an abuse. Sexually physically and mentally. I blamed alot of it on God. As a teen I rebelled I partied alot and drank. I stayed drunk. I never did drugs alchol was my best friend. I could drink pass out and then I didnt have to think of my problems or troubles or the abuse I went thru. I ended up married at age 19 had my first baby at 20. I have 2 kids now. I drank all the time I was raising them. How I made it then I will never know. One day little over 2 years ago now I was depressed wanted to drink but had nothing in the house to drink and no money to get something. So I cryed all that day. I was think of suicide. Someone was at the door I answered the door. She was from a church in town. Invited me to go to church New Years eve which would be the next day. I really wanted to just go out and party all night but I didnt have the money for that. So I went to church with this girl. I dont know why I went but I did. Around midnight the preacher there said it would be a good time to pray and ask Jesus into your hearts to start the new year. I just couldnt do it then I ran out of the church. I went home got on the computer thinking about all that went on at church. I wanted to drink so bad or kill myself one. But nothing in the house to drink and no money to get it with. Someone at church gave me a website to check out. It was for christian radio station. I went to the web site I listened to the music for a few minutes. And then I saw a link there for Christian chat. I thought ok I will check it out why not nothing else to do. So I did. There was some in the room chatting about Jesus. They said hi and asked me if I know Jesus. I told them I know who Jesus is but I not saved. I told them God wouldnt want me after all I did and how I blamed him for the abuse I went thru. One of them started tell me how Jesus does love me. How Jesus sent me to that room. Before I knew it I was praying with this man in the chat room. And I was saved. New Year's morning 2001 I accepted Jesus into my heart. The desire of alchol left me the desire to kill myself left me. I was changed. Full of Joy and peace like I could never describe. Thank You Jesus. I now am doing all I can for Jesus but sometimes I wish I could do more. I am helping in 2 christian chat rooms now. Telling all I can about Jesus. Wow He is awesome!!!

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