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Date Posted: 01:41:42 06/08/01 Fri
Author: Shadeykins
Subject: D&D scenery (warning: funny)

This was posted on the EN board, and I think it's hilarous, so I HAD to share this!!

-------------------------------

This is a story of a DM (Ed) and a paladin (Eric) during a game of D&D.

ED: You see a well groomed garden. In the middle, on a small hill, you see a gazebo.

ERIC: A gazebo? What color is it?

ED: [pause] It's white, Eric.

ERIC: How far away is it?

ED: About 50 yards.

ERIC: How big is it?

ED: [pause] It's about 30 ft across, 15 ft high, with a pointed top.

ERIC: I use my sword to detect good on it.

ED: It's not good, Eric. It's a gazebo.

ERIC: [pause] I call out to it.

ED: It won't answer. It's a gazebo.

ERIC: [pause] I sheathe my sword and draw my bow and arrows. Does it respond in any way?

ED: No, Eric, it's a gazebo!

ERIC: I shoot it with my bow. [roll to hit] What happened?

ED: There is now a gazebo with an arrow sticking out of it.

ERIC: [pause] Wasn't it wounded?

ED: OF COURSE NOT, ERIC! IT'S A GAZEBO!

ERIC: [whimper] But that was a +3 arrow!

ED: It's a gazebo, Eric, a GAZEBO! If you really want to try to destroy it, you could try to chop it with an axe, I suppose, or you could try to burn it, but I don't know why anybody would even try. It's a @#$%!! gazebo!

ERIC: [long pause. He has no axe or fire spells.] I run away.

ED: [thoroughly frustrated] It's too late. You've awakened the gazebo. It catches you and eats you.

ERIC: [reaching for his dice] Maybe I'll roll up a fire-using mage so I can avenge my Paladin.

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