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Date Posted: 00:28:11 04/14/04 Wed
Author: Doyle
Author Host/IP: NoHost / 144.138.100.195
Subject: Yes indeedy, Happy New Year!!!!!
In reply to: Bracken 's message, "Happy New Year!!!!! Wheeeeeeeee." on 15:57:13 01/01/04 Thu

Since it's so hard nowdays to get everyone on the board to participate in NES's, I thought I'd do my own one, in which you *all* participate (whether you like it or not) *eg*...


(Sophie) - chapter 1

Once upon a time there was a big fluffy puppy with bad teeth named Angel and a harmless little bunny named Spike. They were the best of friends until one day Faith showed up. Faith was a sex kitten that never grew up. Spike and Angel ogled Faith then Spike said...

*****************

(Bracken) - chapter 2

"I'm a bleached skeleton, kill me now!" Angel obliged by setting Spike on fire with his own cigarette lighter. Angel and Faith watched with glee as Spike lit up like a Christmas tree. "I always wanted to do that." Angel told Faith. "I always wanted to witness Spike's death, quirky." Faith replied. "Who you callin' "quirky"?" Angel asked.

*****************

(Heather) - chapter 3

Angel and Oz were laconic as usual. They would use as little amount of words as vampiricly/werewolfly possible. The sanka was now known as 'Ozboard' and everyone had 'Oz' in their name. "How is this at all relevant to the last chapter?" Dozle asked. "Oh please, like NES's ever have any continuity." Sozler told him. "Isn't this great?!" asked Oz, excitedly. "No, it really isn't." Loz replied. Whoever writes the next chapter, don't stray from the path now...

*****************

(Silver) - chapter 4

Okay, here's the deal. Everything that came before this was a dream. What was *really* happening was Mr stable, accomodating - yet picky, poor, finacially - challenged, devious, repeato Doyle was hallucinating (as he sometimes does). "As I've told you before, I don't repeat myself." he said. He had been put in thumbcuffs so that he couldn't hurt anyone with his delusions. Silver punched him for good measure.

*****************

(Beautyone) - chapter 5

Silver arches an eyebrow. "I'm so into you." Bracken urinates all over the floor. "What the hell are you doing?" Fred holds Doyle on a leash *thwap* "Bad dog." Faith says, "Do me." Beautyone thinks about it for a moment...

*****************

(Goatman) - chapter 6

Too slow. Goat-tee runs up behind Faith and starts making passionate goat love sounds. "Once you go goat...you'll never go back." he informs her. She likes it.

*****************

(Sophie) - chapter 7

"Stop! You're corrupting my innocent little passalong story!" Sophie shouts at everyone. "Exsqueeze me?" asks an uncertain Goatman. "As of this moment, it's over, fuzzyballs." she tells him. "No more farm sex for you."

*****************

(Bracken) - chapter 8

The mild-mannered Bracken gets a phonecall. Her male secretary, Mr Funnypenny, says it's urgent. But Bracken already knows what the phonecall's about: there's a doin's a-transpiring. She can smell it in the air, she can taste it in the water. She dons her cape and rides off on her emu into the night...

*****************

(Swedish Bob) - chapter 9

Uh...okay. Right then, SB and his companion, Clifford the BIG red dog, swooped in and saved everyone. Clifford stomped on the reprehensible Goatman with a big furry paw, which squished him into a sludgy substance. Everyone thanked SB and his BIG red dog then they all went home.

*****************

(qc) - chapter 10

From the goo that was once Goatman rose the almighty qc who was not happy that her fantasy made flesh was dead...again. Just then, the heroic Bracken rode in on her emu. "Here I come to save the daaaaaaaaaay!" she announced. "Hey there, Killer. You're a little late. Everyone's already been saved by SB and his BIG red dog." qc informed Bracken. "That just burns me up inside." Bracken stated. "Well, it seems we have a thing in common. You want to get back at SB for stealing your thunder and I wanna smoosh him good for smooshing Goatman." qc told Bracken.

*****************

(Beautyone) - chapter 11

Elsewhere, Beautyone was playing a game of tort with Doyle. "I'll go first." she offered. "Jon used to practice drawing blood on me." "Uh...huh." came Doyle's reply followed by, "Hmmm." "Let's not talk about that anymore." she suggested. "Crazy B's husband." he murmured. Beautyone felt like she should defend her husband's actions so she explained herself further, "It was for college. I was proving my love by letting him stick me." Doyle just blinked a few times. "I don't think I like this game." "Now it's your turn." she informed him. "Uh...um," Doyle thought for a moment, "Okays, here's one: I drink today. I drank yesterday. I drink many times." Then he left. "Aw, no fair." Beautyone pouted, "I already knew that."

*****************

(Silver) - chapter 12

qc and Bracken (who'd switched sides) were hiding in some bushes and watching SB groom his BIG red dog. "We can't take on SB's BIG red dog, qc." Bracken pointed out. "I know. But it's like I always say, "If you can't beat 'em then have them arranged to be beaten"." qc told her. "I've never heard you say that." Bracken noticed qc was too distracted to reply and she sensed that a plan was brewing inside qc's head. "What is it, Déagol my love? Uh...qc I mean." "I have a cunning plan." qc revealed. "But I thought we agreed that SB's BIG red dog was to formidable an opponent." "Oh I'm not gonna try to take on the sucker," qc explained, "This is just to shake him up a little." "What should I do?" Bracken wondered aloud. "Just stay here." qc instructed her. "If I don't make it, I want you to run like the wind, 'kay? Got it?" Bracken nodded. qc ran out of the bushes and...

*****************

(Heather) - chapter 13

Grabbing the garden hose, qc turned it on and gave SB and his BIG red dog the soaking of a lifetime. Then she dropped the hose and her and Bracken ran down the street. Meanwhile, SB was running around, screaming.

SB:"Why are you making me run around screaming?"

Because it creates a funny mental picture.

*****************

(Swedish Bob) - chapter 14

Heather:"Blah! zzz hey dennis bah haha...shoosh hehe I'm not a horse, damnit haha...what? whee hahaha bye."

*****************

(Heather) - chapter 15

Is that your idea of getting back at me? Well, two can play at that game.

SB:"hmmm OMG IT'S 3AM Get the hell outta here sigh great shoes! New?"

*****************

(Swedish Bob) - chapter 16

I never said, "Great shoes! New?". That's a Doyle quote. Anyway, back to the story. The maniacal qc and Bracken got a rush from soaking the poor defenseless Swedish Bob. "We make a good team." qc told Bracken. "Yes. A groin - grabbingly good team." Bracken agreed. "You're making us very hot and bothered." qc stated. "Us?" Bracken repeated, a bit unsure of what qc meant. Then qc proceeded to clamp her hand over Bracken's nose and mouth. Once she was sure that Bracken was no longer breathing, qc wandered off. After Swedish Bob had put on some dry clothes, he rode his BIG red dog down the street, searching for the culprits who had soaked him. Upon seeing Bracken lying on the ground, unmoving, he dismounted and ran over to her. Being a man-nurse (well, at least Doyle thought he was a man-nurse, for some reason) SB managed to revive Bracken.

*****************

(Bracken) - chapter 17

"That backstabber! She stabbed me in the back! She pulled a Giles on me." SB looked confused. "You know, in 'The Gift' when Giles suffocated Ben." Bracken explained to him. "Shouldn't you be dead in that case?" SB questioned her. "I'm a super hero. Super heroes don't die so easily. And am I the only one who ever wanted to grab Ben and squish him to death?" "Um...that thought had crossed my mind." SB admitted. "You thought about gabbing Ben? lol!" Bracken laughed.

*****************

(Drusilla) - chapter 18

From behind a tree the rest of the board members appeared. "Good news, Bracken, we caught qc!" Silver stated proudly. Beautyone was holding onto qc who was in thumbcuffs. Beautyone copped a feel. "I'm innocent!" qc pleaded. "You're as innocent as Sophie." Bracken scoffed. "Hey! I AM innocent!" Sophie said defensively. "I think it's only fair that I kill you the same way you attempted to kill me, qc." Bracken said menacingly. "Can't we all just chew some purple gum and get along?" Dru suggested. "You're right, I'm the good guy." Bracken said, calming herself down. Then she decided to be unpredictable and said, "No wait, I'm the bad guy!" and began to throttle qc. With impressive SFX qc turned into Goatman. "That looked so fake." Silver commented. "OMG you've got a Glory/Ben thing going on." SB observed. "What's this obsession you have with Ben, SB?" Bracken asked him.

*****************

(Doyle) - chapter 19

It all started when Ben was going to adjust his speakers then SB offered to do it for him. "Hello? You're forgetting about me here." Goatman said, reminding everyone of his existance. "What do you want, qc...er...Goatman?" Doyle asked. "I want sex." Goatman stated, "I like multiple partners/orgies and since you're all here..." At that point everyone ran away, leaving Goatman by his loansome. "Aaaaaall byyyyyy myyyyyyyseeeeelf, don't wanna be, aaaaaall byyyyyy myyyyyyyseeeeelf..."

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