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Date Posted: 13:47:48 04/27/03 Sun
Author: First aired Sunday 27th April 2003
Subject: Episode 8.10 - "THICKER THAN WATER" by Kashmanik

BUFFY THE VAMPIRE SLAYER
EPISODE 8.10 – “THICKER THAN WATER”




TEASER:

EXT. SHOT – SUNNYDALE STREET - NIGHT

(Camera shot of a pair of feet sprinting down a street – the camera pans upwards, and we see that it is Buffy. The camera zooms out, and behind Buffy are Spike, Faith, Willow, Xander and Kennedy. They’re all heavily armed, and have clearly been running for a long time. Faith and Kennedy are aiming crossbows as they run, and both fire bolts simultaneously. The camera spins around following the bolts, and we see them thump into the leg of a massive demon. The demon is similar to a giant spider, although it only has four legs. A thick layer of slime glistens over the demons body. This demon must be at least 20 feet tall)

FAITH: Is this thing ever gonna stop?!

BUFFY: (with an annoyed glance toward Faith) Will, you got anything?

(As they are running Willow is fumbling with a bag of powder, mixing together various herbs in a pouch.)

WILLOW: I think so. Well, it’ll either burn it or turn in yellow, so…..

(Willow hurls the bag through the air, impacting the demon on the back of its head – a large swirl of energy surrounds it then dissipates, showing…. A yellow blotch.)

WILLOW: (quietly) Ah, crap.

(Faith and Kennedy launch another volley of crossbow bolts at the demons legs, whilst Xander hurls a throwing axe at it’s back – the bolts and axe stick into the demon, but don’t seem to affect it.)

BUFFY: We need to do something! We can’t let it take that package! Spike?!

SPIKE: Got it love….

(Spike vamps out and leaps through the air at the demon, clinging onto one of its massive legs. He starts to climb the leg towards the demons head, and we see that there is something wrapped in cloth nestled in a kangaroo-like pouch on the demons stomach. Without warning, the demon leaps 30 feet into the air, sending Spike crashing to the ground, and swatting Willow to the side with a flailing leg. Willow lands with a thud, her head badly cut and bleeding.)

KENNEDY: Will!

BUFFY: Take care of her!

(Kennedy stops pursuing the demon, and kneels down to tend to Willow. Buffy, Xander, Spike and Faith keep chasing the demon, and now they’ve reached the main street of Sunnydale. People are screaming and fleeing the demon as it smashes cars and road signs in its path – then it leaps onto the wall of a building, and simply begins running up the vertical slope. The camera pans across Buffy, Spike, Faith and Xander. They’ve realised it’s gotten away. With a screech, a sleek red convertible pulls up next to the gang. Kennedy driving, Willow slumped unconscious in the drivers seat.)

KENNEDY: Get in!



OPENING CREDITS:


ACT ONE:

EXT. SHOT – MAGIC BOX – NIGHT. (Loud, overly cheerful pop music plays.)

INT. SHOT – MAGIC BOX – NIGHT:

(Dawn is bopping around the shop to the music, carrying boxes of books and magical artifacts. Andrew is helping, but looking very reluctant.)

ANDREW: Come on, could this possibly take any longer? Are we even getting paid for this?

DAWN: (laughing) No, we’re not getting paid. It’s a Scooby thing – y’know, helping out at the Magic Box, getting kidnapped, putting our lives in mortal danger and
making witty retorts.

ANDREW: But how do you afford stuff? I mean, Willow doesn’t work, we don’t…. How do you guys pay your bills?

DAWN: (frowning) Hmm…. You know, it’s never really come up.

(The camera moves away from them to Anya at the counter – she has her hands on a crystal ball, which
is faintly glowing. She is clearly having a conversation with someone, or something.)

ANYA: (frustrated) Gaksh! Gaksh totems! 50! (pause) No I don’t need them sanctified! (aside to Dawn and Andrew) Can you believe this guy?! I’m starting to think cross-dimensional imports aren’t such a good idea!

(Giles has entered from the training room, and catches the end of the conversation. He also grimaces
and switches off Dawn’s music.)

GILES: Supply and demand, remember? We simply aren’t keeping up with our customers needs.

DAWN: Doesn’t that strike anyone else as a little weird? I mean, most Magic Box shoppers only ever want love spells or curses. And now everyone wants the wacky mojo stuff?

GILES: So it seems. There’s definitely a sense of….urgency among the magical and demonic communities. It’s a fair bet that the presence of a sired Slayer in town is more than just coincidence.

ANDREW: Yeah, it’s got everyone freaking out. Clem says a lot of demon families have left town.

DAWN: And when the evil monsters start selling up, it only means one thing.

ANYA, GILES AND ANDREW: (wearily) Apocalypse.

(Anya finishes up her cross-dimensional phone call, and slumps down into a chair.)

ANYA: Well, that was exhausting. Oh, the demon import guy says good luck with the Hirka. Hasn’t Buffy caught it yet?

GILES: No, we haven’t heard anything. Still, I’m sure they’re fine.

ANDREW: Hirka? What did I miss?

DAWN: Demon Import Guy says that some big nasty crossed dimensions, bringing a parcel with it. A parcel of the dark, expensive and dangerous variety.

ANDREW: And he just told us this?

ANYA: Yep. Rival export businesses.

ANDREW: Oh.

(The phone rings on the wall)

ANDREW: Ooh, mine! Mine!

(Andrew rushes to the phone, just getting there before Anya. She isn’t happy.)

ANYA: Hey, that’s my phone! I pay the bills with hard-earned profits! It’s heartbreaking!

ANDREW: Hello, the Magic Box, the one stop shop for all your occult needs, Andrew speaking, how can I help you?

(Dawn rolls her eyes)

ANDREW: (aside) It’s Xander.

ANYA: Put it on speaker.

(Andrew clicks the button, and hangs up the receiver.)

XANDER: (O.S.) Hey. Listen, we’re heading out of town. The Hirka’s decided it likes the open road.

GILES: You’re in a car?

XANDER: (O.S.) Yeah, thank god for Kennedy’s parents. This car’s perfect! Purrs like a kitten….

ANYA: Ugh, spare us the vehicular wet dreams Harris. What’s the demon doing?

XANDER: (O.S–annoyed) At the moment it’s just… running. Hopefully it’ll run out of steam before we run out of gas. (becoming crackly) Hey, I think the signals going. I’ll….

(The line goes dead.)

GILES: Well, it would seem they’re safe. Dawn, it’s getting late – why don’t you head home? It’ll be morning soon. We can handle the import, you’ve helped enough with the stock clearance.

DAWN: OK, call me if Xander calls here again.

ANYA: Will do.

ANDREW: I’ll walk you.


EXT. SHOT – A SUNNYDALE STREET – NIGHT

(Dawn and Andrew walk down the street in mid-conversation.)

ANDREW: So you’re still reading it?

DAWN: Yeah. Tara wrote so much… almost every page has another one stapled to it. It’s gonna take my forever to got through the whole book. Still, it’s nice… feels like she’s still around in a way.

ANDREW: You miss her huh?

(Dawn nods)

DAWN: When Buffy… when she died, Tara and Willow were the ones who looked after me. I wouldn’t have made it without them. Buffy’s a great sister, but Tara reminded me of Mom. I loved her a lot.

(There is an uncomfortable silence. Eventually, Andrew breaks it.)

ANDREW: So, it’s like, a book of spells?

DAWN: Yeah, but it’s also a diary… to be honest, I haven’t been reading the diary parts. It just feels like it would be wrong. They were her personal thoughts…. Plus I took a glance and there was some naughty stuff about Willow, and I really don’t need those details!

ANDREW: (laughing) OK, there’s your place. Could I come to your place for breakfast tomorrow?

DAWN: Again?

ANDREW: Half the fridge at our place is full of blood… it’s off-putting.

DAWN: (smiling) OK, see you then.


INT. SHOT – SUMMERS HOUSE – NIGHT

(Dawn enters and hangs a coat over the stairs, before heading up them.)

INT. SHOT – DAWN’S ROOM – NIGHT

(Dawn slumps down on the bed, clearly tired. She turns on a lamp, and opens a bedside drawer. We see
that in the drawer is a typical collection of memorabilia. A stake, some photos, and something else that
Dawn picks up. It is a hospital wristband, with the name “Joyce Summers”.)

DAWN: Ben.

(Flashback to “Past Tense”, where Dawn discovers the truth about Giles killing Ben. Back to present
day now…. And Dawn is clearly considering something. After a few moments.)

DAWN: Sorry Tara, but I need to know what happened. And I won’t read any sexy stuff!

(Dawn reaches back into the drawer, and takes out the Book of Shadows. She skims through the pages,
clearly trying to find a specific entry.)


DAWN: May 30th, 2001…

TARA: (V.O.) I have so much to write, and no idea how to say it. Buffy is dead. I still can’t quite accept it. She was always so strong, so brave. She died so that we would survive. And for Dawn. Willow won’t stop crying. She just seems so lost, but at least she and Dawn are able to comfort each other. We haven’t seen Giles for a few weeks. He’s at home, and he’ll take our calls, but he hasn’t come round yet. Spike hasn’t left his crypt for days either. Xander and Anya closed the Magic Box. Everyone’s just shut down. We’ve decided that Dawn will stay with us. From what I hear her Dad’s as useless as mine, and she needs people to be there for her right now. I’m starting to feel a little better as well. I can’t feel her in my head anymore at least.

(Dawn is clearly close to tears, but she reads on, skimming past a few pages)

TARA: (V.O.) June 17th 2001. Well, today was weird. Willow managed to get the Buffybot up and running at last. Seeing something that looks like Buffy hanging around is so disturbing. But it’s important that we keep up the pretense that Buffy is alive – I’m not sure we could keep the town safe if anything found out the Slayer was dead. Spike’s started coming out with us on patrol again now. He’s getting better, day by day. It’s good for him that he’s learning to deal. Giles is around a lot more too, but still seems a little distant. He’s been investigating Ben – where he came from, his family, that kinda thing. Turns out that his parents were both admitted to an insane asylum years ago, no doubt Glory’s work. Even though he turned on Dawn, I can’t help but feel sorry for the guy. His whole life was destroyed, beyond his control. It kills me to say this, but perhaps Giles was right. After all, Ben had lived a whole life as a human. Dawn had only been around for a matter of months. They were both abused by outside forces, and neither of them deserved it. But I know that if Giles had followed through on his plan to kill Dawn, he wouldn’t be alive now.

(Dawn throws the book down on the bed like it has suddenly become red-hot. She is shocked beyond
words; she looks like she’s going to vomit.)

DAWN: Oh….my god.


* COMMERCIALS *


ACT TWO


EXT. SHOT – THE BRONZE (EXT ALLEYWAY) – NIGHT

(Raven stands in the shadows of the alleyway. She is eating a large burger, and looks very
relaxed. Amy hurriedly ducks into the alleyway, looking nervous.)

AMY: What the hell are you doing?!

RAVEN: (with a mouthful of burger) Courier. Late. Got hungry.

(Amy heads back to the corner of the alley, peering out both ways.)

AMY: You should be on alert. Buffy and her pals are always hanging out at this place – you can’t afford to lose your concentration.

RAVEN: Lose my concentration? I’m a frickin’ vampire, we have reflexes like tigers on speed.

AMY: Whatever…. (suddenly realizing what Raven said earlier) The Hirka isn’t here?!

(Raven, still munching on her burger, shakes her head.)

AMY: Dammit, I don’t have time for screw-ups like this. It’s a cliché, but I have places to go and people to see y’know! It’s essential that we acquire the delivery.

RAVEN: Blah blah blah. You have an annoying habit of repeating yourself, you know that? Getting tired of hearing you yakking away…

(Raven glances at the burger in her hand, and slowly advances towards Amy who is faced away from
her, looking more menacing with every step.)

RAVEN: Y’know, I’m suddenly finding myself craving a little more than a damn cow.

(Amy slowly turns to Raven, a smile growing on her face.)

AMY: How stupid are you?

(Raven vamps out, grabs Amy’s arm and pulls it to her mouth. As she’s about to sink her teeth in, she
vanishes and reappears a few metres away.)

AMY: You really think I’d hire a mercenary vampire without any kind of protection? You aren’t coming close to me.

(Amy points a hand at Raven, who is thrown back at the wall – the vampire is pinned to it, hovering a
few feet in the air.)

AMY: But I can come close to you. Any. Time. I. Like.

(Amy “drops” Raven to the ground.)

AMY: Now you be a good girl and wait here for our parcel. When it gets here, leave it with the Horsemen. For some reason they seem more trustworthy all of a sudden… I’ll make some enquiries about the Hirka.

(Amy walks out of the alley, a look of smug superiority on her face.)


INT. SHOT – MAGIC BOX – (it is starting to become lighter outside – it’s almost sunrise.)

(Anya and Giles are standing amongst a huge clatter of wooden crates almost fill the floor space of the
Magic Box. A few crates have already been opened.)

ANYA: What the hell is this? It’s all crap! These aren’t occult supplies, they’re cheap and tacky knock-offs! It’s like Faith’s wardrobe.

GILES: You ordered them!

ANYA: He must’ve gotten sidetracked, what with giving us the tipoff about the demon.

(Giles sighs and takes off his glasses to clean them.)

GILES: (wearily) I don’t suppose you’ve got a receipt?

(The door to the Magic Box swings open, knocking the bell of its hinge. In the doorway stands Dawn.
And she’s pissed.)


INT. SHOT – AMY’S BATHROOM – NIGHT

(We get a camera shot focusing on a bucket on the floor – it is filled with blood. Amy reaches for it, and pours it into a bathtub, which is already almost full with blood. The camera pans around the room, which has been stripped off everything except the bathtub in the center of the room. The walls are covered with runic inscriptions which seem to shift by themselves, coiling around each other, melting, reforming. Amy has clearly been using this room for some time. She opens a small wooden box, and lifts a bag of powder out, sprinkling it into the blood in the bathtub. She takes the bucket and box into the corridor outside, then returns to the bath. Amy strips, and climbs into the bath, slowly submerging her entire body under the blood, and then her head.)


INT. SHOT – MAGIC BOX – EARLY MORNING, JUST BEFORE SUNRISE.


(Dawn is still in the doorway, her face like stone.)

ANYA: Dawn, is everything –

DAWN: (icily) I’m fine.

(Giles begins heading towards her, looking concerned.)

GILES: What’s happened?

DAWN: Didn’t you hear me, Mr. Giles. I’m fine. I’M safe.

GILES: (confused) Mr. Giles? You haven’t called me that since you were little.

DAWN: (bitterly) Isn’t that the correct way to address someone you don’t know?

(Giles stops walking towards Dawn, and becomes very cautious.)

DAWN: I want to talk to you.


INT. SHOT – AMY’S BATHROOM – VERY EARLY MORNING

(We see the bathtub of blood, and the camera slowly raises over it for a birds eye view, before lowering
down until the camera sinks below the surface and focuses on Amy’s face. Her eyes are shut, and she is
completely pale. Her eyes suddenly flash open – and her eyes have changed dramatically. They are
now a pale, bright yellow, with a black x-shaped pupil in each eye. Amy is now speaking
telepathically.)

AMY: (V.O.) I beg an audience, holy one.

(A huge ring of flame shoots out from the edges of the bathub, forming a circle of fire around the tub.
This is clearly the reason the rest of the room has been emptied. In response to Amy, a whispering,
hissing noise sounds.)

AMY: (V.O.) I have carried out your wishes. I have summoned an ally with the power to raise the Four. I have set events in motion. I have attempted to retrieve the item as you ordered. But I have encountered a problem.

(The hissing returns, and a long scratch opens up on Amy’s cheek. Her blood flows out, mingling with
the blood in the tub. Amy winces in pain, but continues.)

AMY: (V.O.) I accept my punishment. I simply request knowledge. Why would the Hirka leave town without making the delivery?

(The hissing once more.)

AMY: (V.O.) It flees if it cannot complete it’s mission?

(Hissing….)

AMY: (V.O.) The Slayer. We shall destroy her in your name.

(The scratch on Amy’s cheek heals within seconds, and a look of utter bliss covers Amy’s face.)

AMY: (V.O.) Thank you.

(Amy bolts upright in the bathub, and her eyes morph back to normal as the flames vanish. For a few
seconds, she is still bathed in the bliss provided by whatever she was talking to. But then she is back to
her old self – and she hurriedly climbs out of the bath. She stands amongst a thin layer of ash from
where the floor tiles have scorched, and begins trembling as the blood which completely covers her
naked body begins to drop onto the floor. A close-up of her face shows that she is close to tears, and
her hair, matted with blood, sticks to her face. Without warning she practically stumbles into the
hallway and begins being violently sick into the bucket.)


INT. SHOT – MAGIC BOX – VERY EARLY MORNING

(The scene is still as we left it before, except that Anya is now standing with Giles. Dawn is simply
staring straight at Giles, and if looks could kill….)

GILES: I… I don’t understand. What is going on?

DAWN: I told you, we need to talk. (With a pointed look at Anya) Alone.

(Anya hesitates for a moment, and looks towards Giles. He gives her as reassuring smile, and she starts
to head for the door to the Training Room. There is a deathly hush in the Magic Box…. But it is
suddenly broken by the ringing of the phone. Neither Giles nor Dawn move a muscle, but Anya stops
and answers it.)

ANYA: (quietly) Yes?


EXT. SHOT – DESERT HIGHWAY – AT SUNRISE

(The camera shot is as though we are driving parallel to the car. Faith is in the driving seat, Buffy
beside her. Kennedy, Xander and Willow are on the back seat. Spike is nowhere to be seen. Willow is
talking into a cellphone.)

WILLOW: Anya, it’s Willow.

ANYA: (V.O.) (still quiet) Um, yeah?

WILLOW: Just thought I’d check in with you guys. We’re still chasing the big oogedy-boogedy, and it ain’t slowing down. We’re gonna be a while I think. How are things back there?


INT. SHOT – MAGIC BOX – AT SUNRISE

(Anya turns and looks at the scene in the Magic Box. A mass of crates filled with useless trinkets, the
bell smashed off the front door, and Giles and Dawn; still standing and staring at each other from
across the room. Utter chaos.)

ANYA: (overly cheery) Just peachy, thanks! The import’s going smoothly, we’ve been here all night categorizing the stock, which has arrived without any problems and matches our exact requests, and we all having a whale of a time! Speaking of being here all night… Isn’t Spike with you?


EXT. SHOT – DESERT HIGHWAY – AT SUNRISE

WILLOW: (grinning) Yeah, I think we all got a little gung-ho with the demon pursuit… Should have planned ahead for the sunrise.

ANYA: (O.S.) Holy crap, he’s dead?!

WILLOW: Umm, no. He’s in the trunk.

(Kennedy realizes what Willow is talking about, and leans over towards the phone.)

KENNEDY: Yeah, Spikey’s taking a widdle nap!

(Kennedy leans over the trunk and thumps the roof of it a few times.)

KENNEDY: (teasingly) All snuggled up, aren’t ya big boy?!

SPIKE: (barely more than a growl) SOD OFF!


INT. SHOT – MAGIC BOX – AT SUNRISE

(Anya is giggling down the phone, momentarily forgetting the tension in the room. She stops herself, in
time for - )

WILLOW: (O.S.) Wooooaaaaah!

ANYA: The demon?

WILLOW: (O.S.) No, Faith’s driving. (aside to Faith) Slow down! (back to Anya) I think she was less scary when she was just trying to kill us with sharp pointy things. But I think we’re catching up with the Hirka. I gotta go!

(There is a crashing noise…. From within the Magic Box. Anya spins around to see that a small claw
has punched it’s way through the lid of a crate, and is peeling the wood away.)

ANYA: (overly cheery again) Yeah, me too! Have fun!

(Anya slams the phone down and runs over to Giles and Dawn, who have backed away towards the
ladder to the Book Gallery.)

ANYA: Now I KNOW I didn’t order that!



* COMMERCIALS *


ACT THREE




EXT. SHOT – THE BRONZE – MORNING

(The alleyway we saw before is bathed in shadow as Amy approaches. She stops at the end of the alley,
and we hear the sounds of sobbing.)

FEMALE VOICE: Please… oh god, please help me.

(Amy slowly advances into the shadows of the alleyway, as the sobbing and pleading continues. In a
flash, a figure leaps towards Amy, and stops. The “Female Voice” was Raven.)

RAVEN: (disappointed) Oh, it’s you.

(The vampire heads back towards the rear of the alleyway, and sits down on the step of a side-door.
Amy follows her, before a smell catches her attention. She peers into a dumpster in the alley, and sees a
pile of bodies, at least a dozen. All drained.)

AMY: Do the words “low profile” mean anything to you?

RAVEN: (defensively) Finished my burger. And you’d be surprised how well the “Little Girl Lost” routine works! Anyway, you were gonna make me wait here all day for your precious delivery, I think I’m entitled to indulge myself.

(Raven deeply inhales through her nose, and a surprised look flashes over her face.)

RAVEN: You reek of blood. Human blood….you’ve been drenched in it. What have you been doing?

AMY: And I’m going to tell you that why, exactly? Anyway, it won’t be coming. The parcel. The Hirka’s left town, looks like the Scoobies scared it off. We’ll have to acquire the artifact another way.

RAVEN: And you got this little nugget of information how? You were as clueless as me…

(Raven looks at her wrist, but then realizes she doesn’t wear a watch. Instead she glances into the
dumpster.)

RAVEN: …13 necks ago.

(Amy ignores Raven’s question, and turns away. A look of realization dawns over Raven)

RAVEN: Ohhhh, I see. I knew I was a minion, but I didn’t know I was the bitch OF a bitch. Interesting.

(Amy turns back to Raven, looking deadly serious.)

RAVEN: So, spill. I mean, am I going to be seeing our boss on the cover of “Psychotics Monthly”, or are we talking strictly small-scale here?

AMY: (slowly) Never… talk about the revered one like that.

RAVEN: Revered? (in a sing-song voice) Someone’s got a heeee-ro.

(Amy simply turns and walks out of the alleyway. Raven begins to follow, but reaches the edge of the
shadow.)

RAVEN: What the hell are you doing? Leaving me here?

AMY: (still walking) It might give you a good opportunity to work on your manners Isabella… It’s obviously something your Watcher never bothered teaching you.

RAVEN: (sadly, quietly, to herself) Benito was ten times the man your boss is.


INT. SHOT – MAGIC BOX – MORNING

(Dawn, Giles and Anya are gathered together on the upper level of the Magic Box, throwing books,
candles, anything they can get their hands on at – a leprechaun, or something similar at least. A tiny
green demon is cackling and trying to climb the ladder, but it isn’t big enough.)

DAWN: I frickin’ KNEW they were real! Buffy was always “Blah blah, no leprechauns”.

ANYA: Why the hell are we hiding from it? I’ve killed bodily hairs bigger than that!

(Dawn and Giles give her an incredulous look.)

ANYA: (clearly lying) Uh, Xander’s, not mine!

GILES: (to Dawn) I don’t know what’s going on with us Dawn, and frankly this isn’t the time. Let’s get through this, and we’ll talk.

(Dawn nods.)

GILES: There are some ornamental knives in that drawer.

DAWN: We can’t kill it!

GILES: Why?!

DAWN: Well…it’s so little….

GILES: (sighing) OK…. Then I’ll need you to get to the counter and grab Anya’s crystal ball. See if we can send this… this not-a-leprechaun back to wherever it came from!

DAWN: (grimly) Check.

(Dawn clambers under the railings of the balcony until she is perched on the edge. She takes a deep
breath, and leaps onto the counter, landing in a forward roll. Anya and Giles look at each other, clearly
impressed.)

ANYA: (with a fake sniff and a tear) She’s not our little girl anymore.

(Dawn grabs the crystal ball from the counter, then surveys how she’s going to get back to the balcony.
The “leprechaun” is still blocking the way to the stairs.)

DAWN: Crap. Really shoulda thought ahead!

(She comes out from behind the counter, and warily approaches the not-a-leprechaun. It spins around to
face her, giggling and cackling, leaping from foot to foot. Dawn hesitates, before kicking it like a
football. With a high-pitched squeal it flies backwards and hits the wall.)

DAWN: (cringing with guilt) Oh, sorry…

(Dawn runs back up the ladder, but as she goes, the not-a-leprechaun leaps onto the leg of her jeans and
clings on, unknown to her. She reaches the top, and the creature jumps off, runs away, and turns to face
the trio, cackling at them.)

ANYA: What now?!

GILES: Get back on the crystal ball, tell them we’d like to make a return!

(Anya clasps her hands around the crystal ball, and begins quietly murmuring to herself. Suddenly the
not-a-leprechaun dives through the air towards Dawn, screeching. Giles leaps in it’s way, and the
creature grabs onto his eyebrows. As Giles starts trying to shake it off, the creature starts punching him
in the face with it’s tiny fists.)

GILES: (muffled) Get….this….bloody thing off me!

(Anya is still murmuring away, but now in more of a raised voice.)

ANYA: No, we aren’t going to feed it!

(Dawn talks whilst trying to prise the demon off Giles’ face.)

DAWN: What did you say?!

ANYA: (aside to Dawn) It’s his scabby little pet! It got out of its cage. (into the ball) It’s not our responsibility! Take it back!

(The voice at the other end of the line has clearly just said something that Anya is less than happy
about.)

ANYA: Look Mister, do you WANT me to start ordering somewhere else?

(The not-a-leprechaun begins to ripple as it vanishes from our dimension, then it is gone. Giles, Anya
and Dawn all look at each other. Now that they’ve dealt with that annoyance, they all realize that they
still have to address the situation with Dawn.)


* COMMERCIALS *

ACT FOUR



FADE TO:

INT. SHOT – MAGIC BOX (TRAINING ROOM) – MORNING

(Giles is sitting on the couch at the side of the room, while Dawn paces around. Her angry demeanor
has returned once more.)

GILES: We can’t talk unless one of us actually….well, talks.

DAWN: Yup.

(A long pause.)

GILES: Do you want to flip a coin?

(Dawn gives him a withering look.)

DAWN: I got curious about something. You and Ben.

GILES: (darkly) You know what happened between Ben and I. Courtesy of the Missionary demon that Raven set upon us anyway…. Now I know we haven’t discussed it, but I thought it was fairly clear.

DAWN: There’s more to it than that.

GILES: How? What’s brought all this on?

DAWN: I’ve been reading Tara’s Book of Shadows. Until last night I’d avoided the diary entries out of respect, but I just wanted to understand… Understand why you’d decided to kill Ben. I mean, I wasn’t exactly around at the time. But I read something there. Something you’ve all kept from me, for years.

(Dawn turns to face Giles, with a tear rolling down her cheek.)

DAWN: You planned to kill me Giles.

(This comes like a physical blow to Giles – he really wasn’t expecting this, and it’s taken the wind out
of him.)

GILES: Dawn, I –

DAWN: Stop. I know… why you wanted to do it. Needed to do it even. I… I was ready to throw myself off that tower. I just never thought… never thought you would consider doing that to me.

(All the tension and ferocity in Dawn’s body is gone, as though she has cried it out of her. She looks
like a little girl.)

GILES: (patting the couch) Come and sit down…

(Dawn hesitates – she’s not ready to finish the argument yet.)

GILES: Please?

(Dawn sits.)

GILES: Do you remember when we first met?

DAWN: Yeah. Mom had to come see one of Buffy’s at school about something, and she didn’t have anyone to leave me with, so I tagged along. And you were in the Library. Mom left me with you and Buffy.

GILES: (smiling) That’s right. (he allows himself a small laugh) You got so overexcited, running through the stacks… Buffy wasn’t impressed.

(Dawn smiles for a moment… then toughens up once more.)

DAWN: Does this little trip down Memory Lane mean anything?

GILES: (quietly) Yes, it does. What I’m trying to say is… ever since that day I’ve been very fond of you. Whether it was because you were my Slayer’s sister, or whether it was something else… I’m not sure. But I knew on that day that you’d be different from other children. And I don’t mean in a “Key” sense, there was just… something about you.

(Dawn stands and begins to walk away.)

GILES: Dawn! Dawn, wait! I…

(She keeps walking, ignoring him.)

GILES: I couldn’t bear the thought of my little girl not being real!

(Dawn, and the camera, turn to face Giles. He is quietly crying.)

DAWN: Your little girl?

(Giles has moved across the room, and is sitting on a desk. He is not crying, but tears have welled up in
his eyes. Dawn walks over, but stands a good distance away from him.)

DAWN: What do you mean by your “little girl”?

GILES: To be honest… that’s how I’ve seen you, for a long time now. When you came to Sunnydale, you were still adjusting to your parents break up. But you were strong. You seemed so… happy to see me when I came to your house, or when you were in the Library.

DAWN: I was. Happy to see you, I mean. You had a funny accent, and smelly books.

GILES: I’ve spent my life serving the Council, facing demons… in a way, I almost feel like I neglected my “real” life in favour of trying to help people. I don’t have any real regrets though, with the exception of a family. I’d always wanted a family.

DAWN: And you had Buffy instead.

GILES: Indeed. I would never change my life… there is too much which is precious to me. But at least my desire for a family was satisfied a little… by you.

DAWN: Oh.

GILES: And then, we found out about your… origins. And it effected me more than I’d expected. I’d invested so much of my life into saving the world, into Buffy and the others… into you. I’d given my life to this world, and… I’d spent it caring for someone who didn’t even have a real life.

(Dawn looks horrified.)
GILES: (hurriedly) That’s what I felt at the time. For a moment. I became very… Well, I had doubts. About what needed to be done. And I’ll be honest with you Dawn…

(She walks closer to him.)

GILES: If Buffy hadn’t stopped Glory, if… if Ben hadn’t re-emerged. I would have done it. I would have killed you. To save the world. To save everyone and everything. I hope you can understand that.

DAWN: I understand… I just had to know. I had to know what you were thinking, what you were feeling. And now I do.

(Giles walks over to Dawn, and holds out a hand to shake.)

GILES: Are we alright?

(Dawn hesitates… but she takes his hand and pulls him into a hug.)

DAWN: (at they hug) No, we’re not. But we will be.

(There is a long pause as they hug. The mood seems to lift a little, but not much.)

GILES: (quietly) So you’re reading a Book of Shadows?

DAWN: Yep.

GILES: Magic. Could be dangerous.

DAWN: Could be.

(Giles pulls out of their hug, and holds Dawn by the shoulders.)

GILES: Think you’ll need someone to… Watch you.

(On Dawn’s smile, we fade to…..)


INT. SHOT – MAGIC BOX – MORNING

(Anya is cleaning up the debris from the not-a-leprechaun attack, and occasionally glancing up at the
Training Room door to see if she can hear what’s going on. She is broken out of her attempted
daydreaming by the door opening. In walk Xander and Faith, covered in a thick green goo.)

XANDER: Don’t. Say. A. Word.

(He grabs a tablecloth from the table, and heads back outside, returning with Buffy and Kennedy
[covered in goo also], Willow, and a Spike-shaped cloth. They get inside and crash out, exhausted,
except for Willow who seems full of energy. Dawn and Giles head out of the Training Room to greet
them.)

GILES: Success?

BUFFY: (yawning) Uh-huh. Yay us.

DAWN: Dare I ask…. Slime?

FAITH: Turns out Hirka blood has the smell, consistency, and taste of baby sick.

GILES: You were able kill it then?

FAITH: Yep.

(There is a strange silence in the room. Almost like the gang who just returned are hiding something.)

GILES: And so reassuring to know that no brain cells were destroyed in the effort…

DAWN: Seriously, what did you guys do?

(Spike, Buffy, Kennedy, Xander and Faith all turn to stare at Willow.)

WILLOW: (shyly) Did a spell.

GILES: Nothing… dangerous, I hope?

WILLOW: Nope.

DAWN: (laughing) Tell us already!

WILLOW: OK, OK… I got doing a little research along the way, since we didn’t exactly get much warning from Anya’s source before we had to leave. Anyway, I found an entry in Neltus’ Dictionary about the Hirka. Life cycle stuff, y’know. And how to make it go into hibernation.

(Willow pauses. The gang from the car chase all look like they’re barely listening.)

WILLOW: I had to make it….

(Another pause.)

WILLOW: Horny.

GILES: Oh, good lord…

WILLOW: (defensively) But, the Hirka, they have to hibernate before breeding! So I’m thinking hey, easy! Make it go to sleep, then we chop it into itty bitty bits. Except I had to get the… hormones from somewhere.

(The camera pans along Buffy, Faith, Kennedy, Xander and Spike… who look sort of embarrassed.)

ANYA: You put their horniness into a demon?! I’m surprised you could get any from Xander! So unmasculine…

XANDER: Well it’s a good thing we didn’t take you, you’d have turned it into a nymphomaniac.

GILES: Getting away from the… conversation which I’m sure I’ll wake up screaming about, did you get the delivery?

BUFFY: Yep. One wacky thingamy intended for Raven, now intended for Giles. And his books!

(Buffy gets up and lifts a small wooden chest from her bag. The chest looks very similar to the chest
that Amy used earlier….)

BUFFY: No locks, no markings…. Doesn’t rattle when you shake it.

GILES: You shook it?

BUFFY: …..no. Anyway, the thing is, it won’t open. Some mojo working on it to seal it tight. Willow thinks she can do it though, with some supplies from the shop.

(The front door to the Magic Box swings open, and it’s Andrew. He looks pretty annoyed, like he’s been left out of the meeting.)

ANDREW: Wha-? I-…. (to Dawn) Breakfast?

DAWN: (smiling) Oops?

FADE TO:

INT. SHOT – THE MAGIC BOX – LATER THAT DAY

(The gang are gathered around the circular table in the shop, as Willow’s hands wave over the box,
which is now sitting amongst a circle of candles. There is a glow, and the lid retracts, revealing
something wrapped in cloth. Willow shares an uncertain glance with the others, before lifting the
bundle out. She slowly unwraps it until she can see what it is…)

SLO-MO CAMERA SHOT: Close-up of Willow’s face, gasping in sheer terror….
Her hands releasing the terrifying object….
A glimpse of something shiny falling to the ground…
A metallic clang as it strikes the floor….
And a close-up of an old-fashioned gold pocket watch, with a carving of a serpent coiled around the clock face, and decorated with runic inscriptions…..


GRR! ARRG!

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