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Date Posted: 07:58:21 04/18/11 Mon
Author: Lady Morilka
Subject: The little song I wrote about is now mor or less finished, or at least I don't find any better ideas any more.
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In here>>> -- Lady Morilka, 08:14:19 04/18/11 Mon
Remember, this song is in german so the translation is as acurat as possible and not meant to rime or fit singing.
"Come, I show you the world" posted for critique purpose only, does not constitute publication
Refrain:
Come, I show you the world,
I show you what is keeping it together.
It is the love,
the love for you,
the love for me,
the love for all the world.
Come, I show you the world,
I show you what is keeping it together.
I show you the trees,
the flowers in the field;
I show you what blooms,
I show you what withers.
Refrain
Come, I show you the world,
I show you what is keeping it together.
I show you the animals
and the birds in the forest;
I show you what is craweling,
I show you what is flying.
Refrain
Come, I show you the world,
I show you what is keeping it together.
I show you the fish
in the river and in the sea;
I show you what is swimming,
I show you still more.
The song is meant to have that many repetitions since babys love that. And the tune is a faster one like a brisk walk with the "come" beeing the prominent tone.
No need to crit grammar or wordsetting since it is just a rough translation for you to be able to read it. But any general ideas are welcome.
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A sweet lullaby -- Debi, 13:38:33 04/20/11 Wed
The verses could go on and on, with the singer showing everything, the beasts, the birds, the light and the dark, literally everything. I love it.
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Hmmm, showing light and dark, I like that idea, maybe I'll add that somehow. And you got the idea of the song perfectly! -- Lady Morilka, 02:06:36 04/21/11 Thu
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Well, I think it's beautiful. Despite this being a translation it flows well. And I love how it's so positive. Come, I'll show you the wonder. Thank you. -- Esther, 11:25:55 04/21/11 Thu
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