Date Posted:18:05:33 04/02/03 Wed Author: Carodog Wilson Author Host/IP: 210.50.220.86 Subject: Club X Launch
While a week late, last nights launch of the new-look Club X was a splendid affair. The gathering media assembled at a seedy King Street strip club for the launch, and as George Michael's I want Your Sex pumped over the speakers, club owner Shadow of Darkness appeared.
Giving a rousing speech about why the name and image change was needed, SoD seemed to show complete hatred for ex-Dark Lord Andrew Leoncelli and The Commisioner. After his tirade SoD, sporting a pink jumpsuit, showed off the new Club X.
Basically, the chages are as following:
Club Name: Club X. President: Hugh Heffner. Coach: Larry Flint. Assistant Coaches: Demi Moore and Elizabeth Berkley. Nickname: Nudies. Motto: "Any hole's a goal." Theme Song: Let's Talk About Sex - Salt n Peppa. Home Ground: Heff's Pad. Uniform: Orange jumper with fluffy pastel blue trim. Pink shorts. Pastel blue socks. Alternative Uniform: Pastel Blue jumper with fluffy orange trim. Pink shorts. Orange socks. Est: 2002.
SoD called upon the Commish to make the changes on the website immediately, despite having been informed of the changes last week.
Asked about last weeks loss to the Master Bakers, SoD was ruthless.
"Yeah, there will be changes, just like there was after last season. Cooky was sensational, as was Phil, but the rest were rat shit."
And there had to be admin changes too. "New prez, new coach - new everything pretty much. Everything had to go, bar me. Although, Our gun midfield remains, and Crawf is still skipper. Andy McKay is his deputy."
The launch may have been a week late, but this just served a reason why the Nudies lost on the weekend.
"Quite frankly, we forgot. I mean, why would you have a launch when there are half priced peeps at the Swannie St. Club X?"
