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Date Posted: 11:53:09 04/21/03 Mon
Author: tutter13 (Melissa)
Subject: I haven't read the others yet, but this is my opinion. . .(m)
In reply to: Jeanne 's message, "Funeral question" on 09:29:25 04/21/03 Mon

I think it is healthy for children to learn about this. They are going to encounter it throughout their lives - friends, family, pets. The earlier they are exposed to it and talk to about it in a gentle, understanding way the better they will be able to understand and realize this is a part of life and not be afraid of it. I feel that if we shelter them from things like this it will only scare them more later in life.

My son went to his first funeral when he was about 3. My DHs Aunt died. Jon didn't really know her, but we took him with us. We told him that she was asleep and would not wake up, etc. We didn't make him go up to the casket, but to our surprise he wanted to and said something about sleeping well. I don't quite remember. Also, Jon went with us to a Marine's funeral ceremony that his father was one of the riffle men for. He understands death to the extent that a 5 yr. old can. He wanted to be right up close to see what was happening (it was the cemetary part). When they said the Our Father, he said it strong and proud. He stood quietly at attention the whole time.

I'm not sure what will ultimately be right for you, but I think that exposing Jon to death early on has helped him to understand it and not fear it. I wish you all the best in your decision. Take care. Hugs and prayers for you and the family.

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