丘世文先生的'尤明實錄' -- 關麗珊作品

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Date Posted: 11/05/03 22:39
Author: CHRIS
Subject: 丘世文先生的'尤明實錄'

各位好,可能有部份朋友以前是'號外'雜誌專欄'尤明實錄'的忠實讀者,我想在此留言版與大家重溫丘世文先生生前撰寫的笑話.這三個笑話related to關麗珊小姐在本年四月廿八日至五月二日在'明報'發表的專欄文章.我曾thru e-mail send予關小姐,現就關小姐的建議在此與大家分享及重溫.

1991年11月其中一則,與'烹飪'有關:

--嘩!唔見一排,點解個肚腩大咗咁多呀?
--係呀,畀老婆整大咗呀!中年發福,晚晚學埋呀方太整咁多好餸畀我食,個肚腩都幾難唔大咯!
--啲女人真係好野吓!你後生嗰陣整大佢地嘅肚咩,佢等你臨老整返大你個肚唧!
--我有時望吓望吓個仔嘅樣都會諗:老婆依家整大我個肚就肯定係真㗎嘞,但係後生嗰陣係唔係我整大佢嘅肚我就冇辦法知嘞!

1994年4月其中一則,與'電話'有關:

--嘩!乜你咁勁㗎?每個月D電話費成萬幾蚊嘅?傾IDD都唔駛傾咁多係唔係呀?同老公!
--野就唔係好多傾咋,最弊我老公講野口吃,每個字都幾乎要重覆幾次,未搞到電話費變咗成幾倍咁多囉!冇乜辦法㗎嘞!
--辦法唔係冇嘅!你可以叫你老公將要講嘅野先錄咗音,然後開快轉重播响電話傳送番黎,雖然聽起上黎好似木偶聲,不過都可以慳番好多倍錢㗎!

1994年7月其中一則,與'廁所'有關:

--我公司最近喺美國派咗個新總裁黎香港上任,雞尾酒會歡迎佢,佢要演說,為咗要擺入鄉隨俗姿態佢係要用中文演說,於是佢寫咗篇簡短嘅演辭叫佢嘅秘書譯成中文,並同佢音譯咗到時照讀.哈!點知佢怱忙之中唔記得咗寫埋開場白嘅LADIES AND GENTLEMEN.咁啱我同佢一齊去酒店赴會經過酒店嘅廁所,佢突然停低指住男廁女廁門口上嘅符號問我中文點讀.我唔知佢搞乜鬼家嘛,於是照譯咗俾佢啦!點知大鑊,佢即刻記低响張紙等到演說嗰陣一開始就話:'男廁,女廁,我今日好開心同你地一齊......'結果成晚全場都由頭笑到尾!
--咁你未好大鑊?害成佢咁?
--大鑊,我依家昇咗做副總裁添呀!散咗會之後我急急話俾佢聽佢嘅演說好成功,全公司都覺得佢幽默風趣,佢開心到尾都搖埋呀!

各位喜歡嗎?如各位不介意,我今後可post更多的'尤明實錄'與大家分享!Thanks!

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Replies:

烹飪 -- 紅寶石, 12/05/03 1:48
Re: 丘世文先生的'尤明實錄' -- CK, 13/05/03 17:20
- Re: 丘世文先生的'尤明實錄' -- Dragon Ball, 14/05/03 16:55

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