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Date Posted: 07:49:11 02/08/02 Fri
Author: Logan
Subject: Life as a Female Bear

LIFE AS A FEMALE BEAR

If you're a bear, you get to hibernate. You do nothing but
sleep for six months. I could deal with that.

Before you hibernate, you're supposed to eat yourself stupid.
I could deal with that, too.

If you're a mama bear, everyone knows you mean business. You
swat anyone who bothers your cubs. If your cubs get out of
line, you swat them too. I could deal with that.

If you're a bear, your mate EXPECTS you to wake up growling.
He EXPECTS that you will have hairy legs and excess body fat.

I wanna be a bear.

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