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Date Posted: 17:57:26 12/30/05 Fri
Author: KF
Subject: Re: guyspeak, answer part 2
In reply to: divalove11 's message, "guyspeak" on 13:44:05 11/24/04 Wed

(got interrupted, sorry)

... now, in direct response to your question about what 'take care' means, I'll give you my best attempt, what with my not knowing him.

It's a breezy, cheerful, noncommittal way of signing off an email. It has no hidden meaning. (He hardly knows you, so he's not about to send cryptic messages! Anyone who'd do that so early on -unless it's an inside joke- is a bit too weird to be a good boyfriend, btw)

One example I can give you (which personally irks me but I've learned to see it as unimportant): my fave guy has a habit of replying to my msn-chat signoff with 'bye'. That's it. Just 'bye'. I might say 'talk to you later, ((((him)))), smilie' .. etc. and what do I get? ..
'bye'.

It may just be this man's style. Over time, you'll find that style is not as important as intent. Does he seem to want to be with you? Does he do nice things for you, compliment you, gaze into your eyes, talk about things you might do together later, etc? Is he considerate? These are things to look for, not how he signs out of a letter. I realize it's nerve-wracking, believe me, I've been there, and to some extent I still feel those panicky pangs that make me wonder if I'm just seeing what I want to see.
However, my guy has proven he does want a connection, so I've been mostly able to dispense with my need to know what every single little word he says might mean.

Here's one more thing - consider it an essential TIP: you are not responsible to figure out what someone does not tell you directly. (This works both ways, incidentally.) If you won't tell somebody something, they can only guess. It's not fair expecting others to read your mind. By the same token, if dateguy of yours isn't SAYING he doesn't want to see you again, then do him and yourself a favour and don't ASSUME that's what he means. That will only provoke you to put up defenses and to pre-punish him for stuff that others might have done to you.

.. is that fair?

Take care. :-)

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