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Date Posted: 19:11:29 06/09/09 Tue
Author: Shelly (happy :))
Subject: Love is. It just is.

Tori was lost. Was Paulie delirious?

How can Tori justify leaving Paulie, who loves her unconditionally, to please her parents who will only love her if she is who they want her to be? Love holds no restrictions. Love is, and can only be, unconditional. There is no other way to love.

Tori's parents no doubt sacrificed for her: their money, their time, their ears, their careers, themselves. How can so little love come from so much sacrifice?

Paulie's love for Tori was exact, acute, and natural. She loved her with every thing she had to offer. And Tori's love was everything to Paulie. So, when Paulie lost that love, what else was there to live for?

What else is there to live for, if not love?

What is it about Paulie that she broke?
What was it that broke Paulie?
Was she not strong enough?
Was the pain too much to hold up?
Did the love for Tori run so purely inside her that to strip her of that reciprocated love, was to shred her of her veins? (How did Paulie-- who was loved so little-- learn to love so acutely?)
Maybe it was just the flare of the film industry that sent her to her grave.

In high school, my teacher told my class about a student-boy, pumped with too much testosterone, and too little serotonin. He had lost his girlfriend and was going to take a jump from the top of the school. As far as he knew, there was nothing left to live for, if not love. And my teacher said he was a fool, pathetic to think that love was worth such absolute devotion.

Is Paulie a fool, pathetic to sacrifice everything-- her dignity, her life, her pride-- for real love? This sympathy I feel for Paulie, is it just the emotion drawn out of me by the wiles of Hollywood? Or can I, in my own small way, relate to the pain that Paulie feels?

Another question:
Is it right, is it fair, to compare this part of my life, my love, with Paulie's?

Was I stronger than Paulie?
Was the pain not so harrowing for me?
Did I not love her as deeply as Paulie loved Tori? If not, do I know love?
Was I simply not so rejected as Paulie?

I'm a different person than who I was then. What would I do now if she were to abandon me?

I pray to whatever God is listening that it isn't destiny, it isn't required, for she and I to end like Paulie and Tori. What I would give up for her!

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