| Subject: Hmmmm. |
Author:
Paul
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Date Posted: 06:56:44 02/15/04 Sun
"I believe I was seen as some sort of trouble-maker. No, I know I was."
Well Hitler was also "seen" as some kind of Fascist and the devil is also "seen" as some kind of evil. Cutting to the chase, just because you claim you're "seen as something" (inferring you at thereby innocent) does not mean you are innocent. You're trying to justify yourself.
"It seems to me that there is the same exact dynamic at play. There's almost a obsessional hand wringing"
Maybe, but on your part there is an obsessive arrogance claiming to be "above all that" by looking down on it in judgement as though you are perfect and more than all of us. No doubt we are therefore in need of your "enlightened wisdom" which you will be quick to offer us. A game intellectuals like you often play.....
"there's the messages from people who take that too far into the realm of a public display of self-flaggelation"
You mean - in your opinion. And that opinion is probably wrong. Re-read the comments above on the arrogance of intellectually judging others as though you are above them all or some kind of deity.
"is the totally obnoxious game of one person telling the other to relax or to trump the other guy by "outing" their resentful motives... that little trick seems to be the currency of power among Roy groupies."
If that is actually happening (maybe....maybe not)it is no more obnoxious than having unresolved resentments that you inflict on others by your barely cloaked venomous barbs and comments here based on false judgements - a kind of "everybody is stupid except me" diatribe of self-justification....
"quit trying to be so pious."
You mean - in your opinion. Whether people are "posing" as pious or are actually speaking from the heart is not your call (your judgement being impaired by your resentments). Leave such things to God.
"although I did make a couple of dear friends, no question"
Well, there are always defectors out there to follow your 'Dathan' (see the movie the Ten Commandments if you don't know what that means). Like him, you know how to push their judgmental buttons and play on the emotions (more often than not their need to be angry with someone or something). A lot of people play that game by the way - of scanning for and preying on the weaknesses of others to convert them - so sorry to burst your bubble but you did not patent it.
"But the thing that will always grate on me --and I'll just say this and move on--"
If you're such a good person why would things grate on you? The fact that it does probalby means you will NOT move on. That is the way resentment works.
Your problem is you have unresolved grudges (resentments) against either the FHU or people who you encountered at the FHU, which you now act out by in sitting in judgement on it or them - attributing motives which are not there in most cases so you can find fault with people and validate your own "sanctity" (as though you are right and they are wrong). They refused to see you as a good person? Maybe they were right......
The problem you have with your approach is this - when other people become aware they see in the words of others whether there is a malicious intent there. And it is always possible to tell that whether you try to hide it from them or not (you are not that good an actor). Resntful people have to be true to their nature.
The kind of comments you make and they manner in which you make them are not intended to help anybody or build a better world. They are merely the potshots and gripes of a malcontent angry (secretly or otherwise) because they have not been seen in a good light and welcomed into the fold just as they are (with their faults.
Your problem is you hate other people - both for what they do, and for what they will not do, especially for you.
As your comments reveal, it matters not to you whether who is right or wrong, merely that you can portray yourself as "right" and other people as "wrong" regardless of the facts - so if the facts won't do to serve that purpose, accusations or some kind of innuendo will be found : the "you're only doing that because" routine....
It's a very old game you are playing here, the kind of 'mad preacher' territory we've all seen and heard before ("follow me and everything will be OK").
Meanwhile under the surface, you have your hates, resentments, hang-ups and compulsive behaviours just like anybody else which you are not aware of and you defend.
So you are in no position to judge others as you don't even know yourself, let alone others.
That is all I have to say for now : I am sure you have more angry barbs waiting to 'repudiate' the points I have made....
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