Discussion Board -- Roy Masters / FHU Discussion Board (no affiliation)

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Thursday, May 15, 08:19:12pm

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Subject: Discussion Board

Author:
Rick Hurst

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Date Posted: 10:47:37 01/08/04 Thu

Merv said: "There are serious problem with having a disccusion group on the website. If the members pay money to be on the website, how can you ban them from using the discussion group? If you can't ban them or moderate what goes in, you can't control it at all...When you ban a paying member or stop his posts from going in, you are going to create an enemy who wants his money back. That is fine but it is still a problem."

Me: Hi Merv, Glad to see you here. You make some interesting points and I understand where you are coming from but in response to the above statement let me just say this. Even the most exclusive County Clubs in the world have rules that the paying members MUST observe or lose the PRIVILEGE of being a member. MONEY BACK does not apply when the error is knowing violation of the rules. Seems to me that a website, list or discussion board could do exactly the same thing. The onus is on the member NOT the board for gross violation of the rules.

In reference to bashing. I think that people SHOULD correct others but it should never include insulting name calling as opposed to plain spokeness. This is a difficult subject to get consensus on as there are plenty of different understandings of the difference between the two, and as you and Sunny have said, it is difficult enough to correct someone through written word without benefit of seeing a facial expression, so anything but plain spokeness, IMO, often helps to create an enemy where that intention was otherwise.

Example: You might say to someone in a response "I think that you are female in the way you are responding to your wife, you're a wimp and you need to learn to stand up to her like a man or there will never be peace in your home" which I think is plain spoken, but said like this "You, my limpwristed friend, have no peace in your home because you are a weak widdle female and you're never gonna be a man and will always remain a sniveling little wimp until you stand up to her". is more than plain spoken, it has ego stuff added into the truth. The first statement is fair and just and the hearer has little room to judge the sayer of it because he would have to manufacture excuses to ignore it. The second way contains extraneous and insulting words that give the hearer plenty of excuses to sieze upon and judge the sayer. By focusing on the extraneous words he is given an opening to avoid looking at the truth contained in the statement. Correction should be impersonally plain spoken with simple truth and facts. Anything else is sin in my opinion and defeats the purpose of the correction.

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