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Subject: I'm not in it alone!

Author:
Red Rock

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Date Posted: 21:30:00 06/09/04 Wed

I can�t begin to tell you how excited I was to rediscover my sensual desire, to have the flow of this juicy energy thriving in my body. It is an expression of my being that for 3 years now has been lost, forgotten and neglected. Like a favorite treasured item that you thought was gone, I have found her � electrified and fully present. And I can�t begin to tell you how much fun it is to have her with me again - to play with, indulge in and express myself through. In those moments I love being me � because I can feel, love and embrace myself completely.

But, here is the catch�With all of this opening - opening to the sensations in my body, opening to living in my turn-on, opening to sitting in my desire, comes a lot of muckidy muck � like emptiness, lonliness and sadness. Ugh, isn�t that the fucking reason I disconnected and went into hiding in the first place. To avoid feeling this!

So, I sit with those sensations, experience them, and let them also be the loving parts of me. Sometimes I even mock and laugh at myself (silly girl). And I will admit lately, it has been more of a struggle to be me. But, last night � I really felt supported by a community that cared. And for the first time in a long time I felt like I wasn�t it all alone. So, I just wanted to say thank you for being a part of my life and sharing your tenderness with me.

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Replies:

Subject	Author	Date
It is a pleasure....	Robert	10:31:50 06/10/04 Thu

And....	Robert	10:51:25 06/10/04 Thu