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Date Posted: 02:12:17 07/26/06 Wed
Author: gem
Author Host/IP: h105.150.141.67.ip.alltel.net / 67.141.150.105
Subject: time again.

I have the worst luck in life and with people....though
I try so hard to be nice, it never works out, for me.

On this one board I visit, this girl told me.....that
another board member.....(told all the other)girls...
not to talk to me. She (felt)-I should know.

So I spent the night crying about it.
Then the girl says, I'm sorrry.....I shouldn't have told you.

Then 3 months later, this other girl tells me.....(that the
friend who told me about the other girl........aobut not talking to me......)-well.....that she told them all.....(she wasn't going to respond to my posts either......though she was emailing me privately.

I was soo hurt and soo betrayed. I then......asked the
first girl, if she really did that......(tell them not to speak to me). She said......she never told the other girl that! It was a big mistake.

Now the other girl.....who told on the other.....girl......must have told her! So now this girl who privately emails me... today........!!!!!

This is her message to me!




I don't need the melodrama in my life.
I go to the board to have a good time, and escape from the troubles of life. I am through getting involved in squabbles between board members. I got burned before by making a public show of support on the Lair, that is why I refuse to do it again.

You are always worrying about people talking behind your back...... but it seems that you have been discussing me with others behind mine! I would think that all of the e-mail discussions we have had would have shown you that I am your friend. But I guess not , if you feel the need to have me make some public sort of statement.

I have never repeated anything that you have told me in confidence. And perhaps I have heard rumors also about you----- but I have chosen to make up my own mind rather than listening to the gossip of others.



So now I feel guilty, confused and torn.

I apologized to her.....but truly I feel like hell.

Also note: The webmistress of this board I visit
knows all about everything and her hands are tied
more or less.

She even told me, (that the girl )-who emailed me
this message.......was doing one thing......(being nice to
me)--while.....telling the girls......everything I said....in y private email's.



Why do I care? Where do I go from here?
Why do I go back? It's only because I met
one or two others.......who were kind to me......
and because I am able to be a fan...to
somone.......that I love..in my heart.

Now that I've said all this......I'm not sure
anymore.....of what to do?

It's all like childish, school room stuff.

Who knows, why people do as they do?
Who knows? Why....in heaven's name......do I
get in the middle of crap!? It follows me.

I dont' know? Gem

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