Blind Bishop Flys Solo At DWU -- Creative Writing

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Date Posted: 15:01:47 01/02/01 Tue
Author: BBC
Subject: Blind Bishop Flys Solo At DWU

Name: PNG NEWS
E-Mail:
Subject: Blind Bishop Flies Solo
Body of Message:

Blind Bishop Flies Solo at Divine Word "University"

It was a great day for Divine Word University and the SVD.
Newly appointed Bishop Douglas Young SVD announced that
he was going to fly solo on campus as part of the Open Day
celebrations.

The Blind Bishop (I see nothing) walked smartly from the
assemblage of priests over to the parked plane. The students, amassed on the other side of the road, voiced their approval.
Just as Blind Bishop Young SVD got to the side of the plane, he dismissed his seeing eye dog. "He is really going to fly that plane alone," the crowd gasped.

The aeroplane was an open cockpit T-2 trainer borrowed from Air Niugini. Blind Bishop Young SVD hoisted himself into the front seat and fell sitting backwards. His foot hit the throttle and the plane was off.

The Blind Bishop was still facing backwards as the plane
started down the road. "Bonk Butt for the Boys" the priests
all shouted as the students placed bets on whether the Blind Bishop would ever get into the air, and if so, if he would get back down again.

The plane raced down the road as the Blind Bishop pulled
himself up on the seat and then out onto the fuselage. Blind Bishop Young SVD was still facing the tail of the plane as he crawled further out on the fuselage. "Where is he going?" the students gasped. "Who knows?" "Remember he is blind," came the reply.

The plane hit a ditch and flipped over on the ground. Blind
Bishop Young was thrown forward like from a catapult. He
sailed though a tree and landed with his head between the legs of Sister Maria Florkova SSpS on the official reviewing stand.

"He flew, he flew," shouted Father Jan Czuba SVD. "It is a
first for my School of Tourism." "From this day forward we
will teach flying and train pilots for Air Niugini. "We will give The Bishop Douglas Young Award for superior flying." "It will be a companion award for the Father Frank Mihalic Award for Journalism."

Several fights broke out in the student section as it was
disputed whether this counted as a real flight as the plane
never left the road. Lots of money had been bet that Blind
Bishop Douglas Young SVD would never get off the ground.

It took several minutes for them to remove Bishop Young SVD
from between the legs of Sister Maria Florkova SSpS. It
appeared that he was not stuck so much as he would not let go of her behind. As for Sister Maria, she was heard to be
repeating, "Have Mercy, Have Mercy," alternated with "Yes
Doug, Yes Doug, OH GOD YES DOUG!" There was much
grumbling across the road about how everyone had had their
head between the legs of Sister Maria, and this was no big
deal.

As for Blind Bishop Young, he later said that for a minute
there he thought he had died and gone to heaven. When first
informed that he had actually been wedged between the legs
of Sister Maria Florkova, he said, "Well, I may not have been in heaven but I was very close to it." Several of the priests in the SVD said this was in fact an "instant conversion", but they would still rather land on a choir boy. But if this made Bishop Young happy, well that was all right also. After all, he would always turn her over, one of them opined.

Father Jan Czuba SVD then pleased the crowd by announcing
that everyone could "adopt" a son or daughter for the night to help celebrate the historic flight. Blind Bishop Doug then waived his blind man's cane at the crowd while they roared their approved. The seeing eye dog then peed on the foot of Father Jan Czuba SVD. All agreed that this too must be some sort of "Sign".

Some of the students were still fighting when Father Jan Czuba announced that he would personally pay all the student wagers against the Blind Bishop. "I saw him fly, and we all know that priests don't lie," said Father Czuba SVD. "But I will pay anyway to help celebrate this historic day." "In fact I will pay double." The students all cheered and lined up to collect and count their kina.

The Australian High Commissioner, Nick Warner, was in
attendance. He seemed sceptical of the entire matter until
University Trustee Peter Barter called him aside behind the
official reviewing stand. After Peter promised free rooms at his hotel for Nick for the duration of his stay in Papua New Guinea, and handed the High Commissioner a suitcase, Mr. Warner said he too clearly saw the flight. In fact by his count, Blind Bishop Young had circled the school three times before coming in for a perfect landing.

As for the Blind Bishop ending up between the legs of Sister Maria, well that was after the flight. The plane had developed trouble after Bishop Young had landed it, and Blind Bishop Young was actually out inspecting the tail assembly after the perfect landing. He ended up inspecting a different tail, that
was all.

Also, Blind Bishop Young was now a Bush Pilot. The proof
was he had landed in Sister Maria's bush. Divine Word
University indeed worked miracles. Even blind men could
fly. Yes, AUSAID would be helping fund the new school of
flying at Divine Word University as long as it was part of the Peter Barter School of Tourism.

"Bonk Butt for the Blind Bishop", the priests all shouted.

(As reported by a student reporter to the PNG News.)

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Replies:

Re: Blind Bishop Flys Solo At DWU -- Dorothy, 06:35:11 01/14/01 Sun