| Subject: Re: Nicole |
Author:
Nicole
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Date Posted: 18:37:41 01/11/06 Wed
In reply to:
Lyndon-at your service
's message, "Re: Nicole" on 17:23:49 01/11/06 Wed
>Yea, she just wants to throw parties-she did mention
>starting a magazine, but we'll see.
Tell her that I say I think she would be very good at starting a magazine. Something like this one I picked up last night, HYPE, I think it is called, where it's about the rich life and living in luxury, etc. Oooh. I would so read that. lol
>
>must I pay for you?
No, it's going to seem very strange to you. You will not pay a dime for me, because you would not be "buying" me. lol I would actually bring simoleans and objects to you, because it is my dowry. It's like gifts that I will bring to your family, only it's basically jsut simoleans. Not much, I'm afraid.
Our mulilan used to be quite poor, but over the years, my tekarij have worked hard and now we are middle class. Well, I guess we're actually doing even better than that, now, from what I hear.
Anyway, the basic premise of an arranged marriage is for the parents to find the best choice for their child. They will like to know that you are stable, have a job or way to provide for me if I were to be unable to take care of myself, have a good family who will welcome me, etc.
My tekarij will go through a matchmaker to your tekarij and will say something like, We have a poor daughter and her dowry is quite small, why would you want her for your wife when she doesn't have much to offer? This is the only question you, personally, will answer. Just say what you say to me, that you would do anything to be with me, etc. Just speak from your heart and tell them how you feel about me and tell them what your life would be like without me, too, ok? Don't argue with them and say stuff like, She has a lot to offer? What do you mean? Of course she's a smart girl and has a lot going for her, etc. Ok? That would be very bad. lol
The matchmaker will take this answer back to my tekarij and then the next question will come. It's a long process. You and I have nothing to do with it, basically after this initial question. After the first question, everything else will be between our parents, Lyndo.
So, my Mah will come to your mah, through the matchmaker, always, and say something like, I taught my daughter all I know, but she isn't as good at cooking as I am, (even though I'm not really that bad, lol, but who cares, cuz you are a GREAT cook! lol). Why would your son want such a daughter for his wife? It will seem like they're insulting me every time they ask a question, but the whole point is it's a test to see how much you will love me and keep me, in spite of my faults, flaws and imperfections.
You'll know you're nearing the end of the negotiations when the tables will suddenly turn and Parther will say something like, I have worked my nails to the bones, I have many callouses to show how much I love my daughter. Why should I give her great dowry to a young man who hasn't worked a day in his life for this girl? She is like a diamond in my eyes, no she is worth far more to me than that. She is priceless. How can I give my most precious possession to a man who I do not know and who will probably throw her away when he finds someone he likes better (or something along those lines, I don't know what!)? Now, they'll be insulting you! Prepare your tekarij. They will have to defend you, without making you look too good to be true, and without seeming to argue with my tekarij. It can be tricky, but I'm sure they can do this.
They will basically need to assure my tekarij that if you were to try such a thing, I would still be embraced by your family as if I were their own daughter and they were my own family and would not allow you to ruin my reputation, etc.
Then they will say, your son might be weak and have a sickly constitution. What if he takes our daughter and dies soon after? Your tekarij just have to keep reassuring my tekarij that they will be like my own family and I will be treated like their own daughter. If they want proof, just tell the truth that your mom already has bought me some clothes when I came to visit, of her own volition, that you put me up in a safe boarding house and I was well cared for and fed the whole time. That my virtue was carefully protected and guarded and you'd never do anything to hurt me, intentionally.
It's so stupid! I wish Matri would just be more open minded and not make them have to go through all of this, but anyway, that's pretty much how it goes and it takes awhile. I haven't heard back from them, yet, but hopefully I will by tomorrow.
(you're priceless, but I think I could
>petition my aunt Daphne for some simoleans-she's the
>one with the mansion). I'd take very good care of you,
>I'd work day and night lots of jobs to make sure that
>you are happy. I'd go to the moon for you. Tame wild
>beasts! crawl across the desert! anything!
Yes! Say this when they ask you the first question. It's perfect! lol
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