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Subject: Has anyone seen my lovechild? Author: Jackie Chan [ Next Thread | Previous Thread | Next Message | Previous Message ] Date Posted: 20:31:32 11/13/06 Mon To whom it may concern.... Im writing in desperation.... to seek your help. All your help, the good people of Kenilworth RFC. You see, it was 26 years ago, when I last visited the rural picturesque little haven that is Kenilworth, a town which I hold very dear to my heart. You see, it was on one pleasent summers evening 26 years ago when I met my one true love. Our eyes met accross the clubroom, and I knew she was the one. 5 minutes later we were writhing in naked ecstasy on the changing room floor. It was the greatest minute and a half of my life. It really was. As it turns out, my actions that night had very severe consequences, as my turbo charged- oriental seed did the business which resulted in the birth of my only son 9 months later. Ive never heard from him, but im sure that at the age of 26 he has long finished his studies at Warwick university and has been in full time employment for at least 5 years now. I would be so dissapointed if i were to find out that he has spent over half the last decade bumming around campus attending the odd lecture at pretty much every course on offer at Warwick. Anyway, if anyone has seen or heard of him at Kenilworth, please respond to this message board, or contact me on 07979 696714. As for his appearence... well, as im sure you can imagine, he is quite short, black hair, yellow skin, stretched eyes, and other nip like qualities. He likes all kinds of foods, ranging from Chow mein, to spring rolls, to fried rice. I do hope that my son will follow me into the film industry one day. Its not hard, ive heard that Warner Brothers hire pretty much anyone these days and that the job of Data Analyst is particularly easy to achieve. Anyone who cant get that job much be a right idiot. I thank you for your attention, and look forward to hearing from you. Kind regards Jackie James Chan (esq) [ Next Thread | Previous Thread | Next Message | Previous Message ]