| Subject: Carrie |
Author:
Coah
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Date Posted: 01/15/06 11:44:26am
Hey, Babe
Can you believe that I was here for less than one day before I started missing you like crazy? lol I'm so addicted to you. How did you do that to me?
Well, Wolf and Carla had a baby girl, Sahara. They're both very excited about her. She's a beautiful baby with big green eyes (like Carla's, they're a little weird looking, but everyone will definately know she belongs to her parents. lol) And bald like Wolf. lmao! She's gota set of lungs like her Papa and Mommy's already dressing her in Baby Gucci. lol She will definately be a princess.
But, all kidding aside, it was a really sweet, and bittersweet, experience to see Wolf's baby come into the world. I wasn't in the delivery room, of course, (I don't think Wolf even wanted to be in the delivery room, but he didn't have a choice. lol But, I got to hold her soon after she was born. It was almost like holding Havee again. My heart broke and yet at the same time, felt like a healing was taking place while I held her. Made me want to have another baby for a minute there. lol
Wolf said he felt almost the same way when he held Sahara for the first time. You know, Addie was pregnant with his baby at one time and miscarried, so I think Wolf was thinking about that alot. Actually, I think it was a huge fear of his that Carla would miscarry through her whole pregnancy. He just didn't want her to have any stress at all. You should've seen him worry about her. That woman was treated like a queen the whole time, I'll tell you what. She's a lucky lady, but I think she knows that and appreciates Wolf, so that's good. Anyway, he said that having Sahara helped the ache in his heart for his other child that he never knew. That's kinda sweet isn't it?
Do you ever want to have kids, Carrie? I'm just thinking about it, because I'm getting older and I won't be around forever. Once I die, there won't even be a memory of me left on this earth, after you're gone. And, it's pretty much the same for you. I'll understand if you're not interested in having kids and it doesn't change how I feel about you one bit, but if you do want to have a baby, we could start to try when I come back. I think I'm going to leave this baby-fest tomorrow, then I'm going to go home and straighten out my affairs there and put up the for sale sign on my house. There's too many memories there and I just can't go home. Hell, I got up to the front door last week and chickened out from walking through it! How pathetic is that? I just couldn't do it, though, so I'm going to have some professional movers go in and pack up my stuff for me and I'll just put it all in storage until I decide what to do with it.
So, now I'll have sunk to a whole new low: a homeless, retired rock star. lol jk I really don't feel homeless, just houseless. My home is in your heart and it's the safest home I've ever had in my entire life.
I love you, Carrie, from the depths of my soul, darling.
Coah
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