learning that God wants me to wait for open doors -- Solomon's blog

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Date Posted: 11:28:54 02/13/08 Wed
Author: Solomon
Subject: learning that God wants me to wait for open doors

Colossians 4:3 And pray for us, too, that God may open a door for our message, so that we may proclaim the mystery of Christ, for which I am in chains.
1-23-08
NEVER AGAIN. God does not want me to share with others unless there is an open door.

Last night I had the idea to share something with Mr. Hamdan that I'd debated about sharing last week. Mr. Terrel Smith has given me counsel to keep the commitment I made to Mr. Hamdan not to share about God or Isa unless Mr. Hamdan initiated or asked. Still, there was one knot left untied from something I felt I should have shared earlier. So, last week the idea came to mind of a way I could squeeze it in. I wanted to share with him my concern that Isa's message about heaven was not in the Koran. I have shared the gosepl with Mr. Hamdan in many forms at various times, and he has always been unreceptive. I've questioned whether I've tried to cram such witness in in ways that God does not desire from me.

I also remember the clearly God-orchestrated counsel that Mike (and then Terrel Smith) gave me about witnessing to Mr. Hamdan and just about witnessing in general.
Mike:
-Sol, you tend to want to complete everything at once-- but with people, you cant always do that.
-You dont want to close the door to opportunities with him and his family
-you may have an opportunity to clarify later on (meanwhile, keep saying hello)
-you gotta learn PATIENCE in witness.
-when you see the conversation closing and you think its incomplete, let it go -- and eventually hopefully
they'll come back to it. Allow God to orchestrate
- -You are kind of eliminating God's option.
---------------------------------
Terrel:
- Prayer is a very effective tool, use it. You already knew that. Do it. :)
- You have given them the Scripture, and shown that you are interested in sharing. Now be patient and let God do His work in their hearts.
- Continue to show concern and interest, and above all, love. Muslims are won by the love they see in us, Christ's love shining through us. They are not won by arguments, or reasoning (although these sometimes help clear the way to receive love).
- People are converted by the Holy Spirit, not us. Their salvation is not up to you. It's up to God. So what can you do? Pray. Love. Share when God opens the door (no need to use a crowbar - you may break the door instead of opening it, let God open it. :)
- Relax a bit. :) It's up to God, remember?
- Find out when they don't have to work and invite them out to dinner (as a family probably won't work, but you can do it individually with the men, not the wife!) At the dinner talk about anything they are interested in, and anything you want to except the Gospel. Yep, you read that right. Let them see you as a whole person who is interested in life, and interested in them. Now, if THEY bring up the Gospel, then you'll know that God opened the door, and you can lovingly answer their questions. Be sensitive to when the door shuts again. They may need time to think about what you share. Give them the time they need. Don't cram.
- Forget the "they might be run over by a truck" panic - God is in control.
- Keep your word to him about being more silent. He will be watching you to see if you keep your word.
- Did I mention prayer? "Let go and let God." Hope this is helpful. In Him, Terrell

Yet still, the idea of sharing that "one last thing" persisted. It was like a compulsion-- something I felt obliged to do. Well, last week I was torn, but went in to the gas station with a resolve to share it, but he was on the phone, so I took that as "door closed". Perhaps this is NOT something God wants me to share--- Mr. Terrel's advice was in mind causing me to question this whole thing. But the compulsions can be powerful and I have a strong sense of duty, so once the idea gets into that category of "duty" in my head, I oblige myself to find a way to carry out, or else I face the pressure/accusation/fear of guilt "Why haven't you done it yet!"

So, the idea was to share the reality that Isa's message on the way to heaven is NOT something found in the Koran. But how could I share this in a way that seemed natural, not forced, still also remembering Mr. Smith's words about not cramming, and about honoring my word-- So part of me still questioned if this would be cramming either way it went? But the force of the compulsion/duty was already locked in with this idea.

Shift ended this morning late. I am sick. Also low on sleep. My AM shift ended, and so then came the first opportunity for carrying out the idea that entered my head last night. The plan was this: Tell him thanks for the help with the car and then offer help if there's anyway that I can and to then say something like this:

"The script"
"and although I cant return the favor when it comes to know-how about cars, if you have any Questions about the injil or Isa's teaching on the way to be clean with God or the way to heaven� Isa's teaching on these things are not found in the Koran and that would be ONE way I can offer help as always, but I remember my word, that I would wait for you to ask, and I want to honor that. Just know that for you all you gotta do is ask-- anytime-- and than I'll know you are interested. Or if you are ever sick and need help at store/shovelling, that is also something I'd be glad to help with. Call me anytime."
(I should state that I've already shared the message about Isa being the way to heaven with Mr. Hamdan, in person and notes at various points over the past 2 years... but I seem to forget what I've already shared and these compulsions are so loud-- ok, end of sidenote)

I pumped my gas, went into store to say it in person-- but it didnt work out. No opening. Got to thinking I could plan to say it next week Wednesday, or call him on the way home. I chose this perhaps because I wouldn't then have carry weight of obligation the whole week for possibility of less risk of cramming if able to leave message on machine'

Anyway, I pulled over the car, called him, and he picked up. I started through my script-- got through much of the stuff when then hen he said--- 'Ok I'm really---" and then I jumped back in (afraid I'd have to endure the compulsion for another time, I guess)-- I crammed in real quick before he could finish that sentence- "the other thing is shovelling..." ---click--- he had hung up

-----------------------------------------
I sat there in my car. Wrote out the following
"Oh YHWH, I have sinned against you. Forgive my sins. I renounce all cramming. Forgive me. "This is NOT your way, for the doors are CLOSED.

---------------------------
When the doors to share with an unbeliever are closed, Solomon, Your way of faithful witness and concern for them is NOT to cram things in against the listener's will. But to pray (like Paul) for an open door to share when open-- briefly, graciously, boldly.
>Fishing first
>Pearls later
(not pearls first, hunting style)
--------------------------------
Oh God, 'my offense is great. I've been stubborn against wise and loving counsel of godly men and have been more led by compulsion/obligation/warped sense of what my obligation is when it comes to sharing the gospel. I long for you to grant me a change of thinking regarding witness. Teach me and empower me to be a faithful witness for you, I ask in the Lord Jesus' name, amen.

May I not ever ever ever EVER let compulsion to share something trample patience for an open door (my clear understanding of the need for and observation of an open door)
------------------------------------------
>>Sometimes, when the door is opened, the message itself will still offend a person (though graciously shared).
>>Still- for my part- don't let it be me/the way I share that is the source of the offense-
i.e. because of an insensitive "crowbar" cramming of the message (even if to appease the attacks of
guilt/compulsion--still unacceptable if doors are closed.) Share wisely, and only as much as the door is open.
-----------------------------------------------------
1 Corinthians 16:8-9 But I will stay on at Ephesus until Pentecost, 9because a great door for effective work has opened to me, and there are many who oppose me.
2 Corinthians 2:12 Now when I went to Troas to preach the gospel of Christ and found that the Lord had opened a door for me,
Colossians 4:3 And pray for us, too, that God may open a door for our message, so that we may proclaim the
mystery of Christ, for which I am in chains.
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