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Subject: The Ongoing Debate Author: Seen This Before [ Next Thread | Previous Thread | Next Message | Previous Message ] Date Posted: 21:09:09 07/11/12 Wed Years ago, I had several discussions with the mother responsible for the original Spank with Love website. At the time, she was one of several mothers trying to get parents to rethink the emotionally-charged anti-spanking propaganda that was sweeping much of Europe and America. In may ways, the moms were successful. As a result of their efforts, the debate has become much more open and balanced. It relies less on experts than on the often prejudiced opinions of childless experts. [ Next Thread | Previous Thread | Next Message | Previous Message ]

Replies:

[> Subject: Re: The Ongoing Debate Author: Suzie [ Edit | View ] Date Posted: 17:46:55 07/12/12 Thu That seems to me to be how things have panned out too. It is a very interesting topic I think - and of course, nice to see some sensible balance come back into the debate. In all of this, what is, I believe, an unassailable fact, is that youngsters and teens were FAR, FAR better behaved, polite, respectful - and probably happier!!, when spanking was far more the norm. Now there may well be multiple reasons for that - but firm and regular discipline was certainly a big one. Suzie [ Post a Reply to This Message ]

[> Subject: Re: The Ongoing Debate Author: Rat [ Edit | View ] Date Posted: 17:11:21 07/13/12 Fri I suppose we here in the Southern USA never really lost spanking. Sure, it has been reformed in schools but it still exists in most schools here. We all know it happens to each other and we all talk about it. Spanking is much more of a way of life here and is very accepted, even way in to the teen years. If you go into Wal-Mart or a grocery on any busy Saturday around here, you are guaranteed to see at least one unruly kid get his butt slapped. I know, I was one of them once - and I was 12 when it happened. [ Post a Reply to This Message ]

[> [> Subject: Re: The Ongoing Debate Author: Tohru [ Edit | View ] Date Posted: 15:08:26 07/14/12 Sat I would say the South has joined the rest of the country in some respects. Very few schools use the paddle in cities, and none where I live. [ Post a Reply to This Message ]

[> [> [> Subject: Re: The Ongoing Debate Author: Rat to Tohru [ Edit | View ] Date Posted: 20:31:37 07/17/12 Tue Can you say where you live? Just generally - nothing that would make it unsafe for you. I will concede that school paddling is out in a lot of major southern cities. I know Nashville has eliminated it BUT there is currently a move in Nashville to re-instate. I am fortunate, yes I said that, in that I attend a school that still has spanking as an option. Now that I have said that I am also fortunate that I have never been in trouble in school all my life - I am in 10th this year. Part of that may just be because of the deterrent that the paddle offers, even when not used specifically on me. I think, however, that there is still a "culture of spanking" that exists in the Southern USA that the rest of the country does not have. Here if Dad wears me out, yeah I am a little embarrassed by it, but I still chat about it with my friends and let them raz me a bit. But, when they get one, they will chat about theirs too. So, we talk about it. That would not happen anywhere else in the USA. That is why boards like this are so popular. It is something that kids want to talk about but they feel they can't - unless of course they live in my part of the world. [ Post a Reply to This Message ]

[> [> [> [> Subject: Re: The Ongoing Debate Author: Tohru [ Edit | View ] Date Posted: 22:25:10 07/17/12 Tue I agree there is generally more acceptance of spanking in the Southern US. I know at least one of my neighbors has openly said they support spanking teenagers, but that was only one of them. It doesn't seem to be too openly supported around here. I live in the southside of Corpus Christi, Texas. I assume it is a bit more common in the smaller towns around here of course. [ Post a Reply to This Message ]

[> Subject: Re: The Ongoing Debate Author: Susan [ Edit | View ] Date Posted: 05:58:44 07/17/12 Tue Spanking has a place in discipline in our house. Used less frequently then it was when we were growing up. Perhaps that reflects the changing times. Having read articles and watched and listened to program's on the pro's and con's of the subject could have an effect on the way a parent may feel about its use, but we believe that when a spanking is called for, it should be given if that's the way you have set it forth. [ Post a Reply to This Message ]

[> [> Subject: Re: The Ongoing Debate Author: PJ for Susan [ Edit | View ] Date Posted: 16:47:49 07/17/12 Tue Question: What earns one for you kids? For us it is always done for disobedience and safety issues. My smart rude mouth gets me too. Curfew violations will also earn a spanking. Getting paddled at school or being assigned Saturday detention is also an automatic spanking. For other stuff, we usually get warned first or get a milder type of punishment, like maybe just a short write-off or an extra chore. [ Post a Reply to This Message ]

[> [> [> Subject: Re: The Ongoing Debate Author: Susan [ Edit | View ] Date Posted: 05:58:16 07/18/12 Wed Disrespect of other people and other peoples things. Smart mouth's, not calling if you're going to be late and lying are about the biggest ones. Other punishments are used more than spanking's though. Does it get used often in your house? [ Post a Reply to This Message ]

[> Subject: Re: The Ongoing Debate Author: Anthony [ Edit | View ] Date Posted: 18:27:36 07/21/12 Sat I grew up in upstate NY until I was 16 before moving to the midwest. This was in the 70s & 80s and even then the attitude toward spanking was changing. I went to Catholic school & spanking was still part of our school discipline as well as at home. The state I live in now banned spanking in public schools years ago but they left it to the private schools to decide for themselves. They generally don't anymore though. Our parish recently debated bringing it back at the school my kids attend. The debate was lively and sometimes heated. There are very strong opinions on both sides of the issue. But after much prayer and discussion we ultimately decided to leave things as they are. It doesn't mean the kids are off the hook, at least mine aren't. They still get spanked at home for getting in trouble at school. That being said, I think more people in this part of the country spank than don't. This is a conservative state with good Christian values. We don't openly discuss it as much as other parts of the country I guess but it is still viewed as good & necessary part of raising our kids. Thank you for letting me contribute to this discussion. I hope we can have more like this. [ Post a Reply to This Message ]

[> Subject: Re: The Ongoing Debate Author: Rupert Adam [ Edit | View ] Date Posted: 03:25:55 07/29/12 Sun A parallel site to this helped our family to explore physical correction when grounding was leading to increased tension. In our country, it is banned in schools and generally frowned-upon in the home. But it has brought us much closer together and I am grateful for it. That does not mean that the moment of bending over is a nice one! [ Post a Reply to This Message ]

[> Subject: Re: The Ongoing Debate Author: Heinz [ Edit | View ] Date Posted: 11:57:29 07/29/12 Sun We live in Germany where spanking kids is not allowed. But our sons (17 and 19) grew up with spankings. They got spanked until age of 16 and it worked. They got it for repeated disobedience, smart mouth, not doing their chores. On average they got it one or two times a month. [ Post a Reply to This Message ]

[> Subject: Re: The Ongoing Debate Author: Bob E. [ Edit | View ] Date Posted: 16:21:17 07/30/12 Mon Spanking is used in our house to foster development of responsible adults. We had been lax in instituting a comprehensive program of discipline in the house, and are now "making up for lost time," in a sense. Since incorporating spanking as a consequence for misbehavior, we are seeing a big improvement in our children's attitudes and demeanor. Spanking is not in wide use where we live. Thus, our children aren't in contact with a large number of other children who are spanked. It's our hope through participation in this forum, they will realize that they are not the only children in the world who are spanked by their parents, and that there are benefits to our approach to responsible adulthood. [ Post a Reply to This Message ]