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Date Posted: 12:57:07 10/21/99 Thu
Author: The Slinger
Subject: Impact This Mr. Steel.
**The Scene – The Slinger’s livingroom. It is furnished exactly as you would expect it to be – Midwest ranch house style. The walls are all done in white cedar, a fireplace is the focal point, with many title belts lining the mantel. On another wall a cow’s skull with horns sits over an antique wagon wheel. The furniture is all down in black and white cowhide, and all of the lamps, etc. are gold-trimmed, and the rich luxuriant carpet is a deep golden beige.
The Slinger is sitting on his couch, and Jeff Pettingzoo sits on a chair opposite him. The Slinger’s trademark outback hat is sitting on the horn of a weathered old saddle beside him. On the antique wooden coffee table between them sits a three-quarter empty bottle of Jose Cuervo Reserva tequila. They have obviously been there a while. Jeff is sitting back in his chair, legs crossed, waving a shotglass around as he speaks. The big screen TV is on, and the surround sound system is booming as they both watch some of Brad Steele’s fights and his promos.
Jeff – So Slinger, are you worried about this upcoming match with Brad Steele?
The Slinger leans back and puts his boots up on the table.
Jeff – Well, you seem to be studying his matches fairly intensely.
The Slinger sits back up and leans forward to pour himself another shot of tequila.
The Slinger – The only reason that I am studying this Jeff, is because this man is a rung. I want that North American title, and to get it I have to go through this guy. If he wasn’t between me and the title, I wouldn’t even waste the ink in my pen to sign a match with him. I just want to beat him as quickly as possible so that I can get on with my life. I have some work I’ve gotta do around the ranch this weekend, so I’ve got a Friday night flight back here from New York after the match.
Jeff – So you’re fairly confident.
The Slinger – A mild understatement Jeff. Here, have some more of Jose’s finest.
Jeff – Speaking of Jose, what do you think of El Toreador?
The Slinger – Jeff, I feel about Sparky the same way I feel about anyone else who has to hide in numbers. He’s coward, just like the rest of his little buddies.
Jeff – Um, Slinger, that’s President Vengeance your talking about there.
The Slinger – Yeah, so what? If President Virgin has a problem with that he can take it up with me directly.
Jeff – How about Mystery Man?
The Slinger – You mean Mystery Meat? The only mystery about that guy is why he’s such a dork. I notice that I have to fight this sponge on Tuesday. I knew that sooner or later he and I were gonna butt heads. Fitting for him I guess, because he IS quite a butt head.
Jeff starts laughing at this and sprays tequila.
The Slinger – Hey there, easy now boy, this is the good stuff. I don’t bring the Reserva out for just anybody.
Jeff – So you are confident about Tuesday night as well?
The Slinger – Let’s put it this way Jeff, on Friday, I’m gonna give Mystery Man a little taste of what is in store for him on Tuesday from me. I’m gonna change his name to the Misery Man.
Jeff – You’re gonna interfere with his match on Friday?
The Slinger – I’m gonna interfere with his LIFE on Friday.
Jeff – So back to Brad Steele. Bottom line?
The Slinger pours himself another shot of tequila, stands up, retrieves his hat, which he places firmly on his head. He straightens his vest, and looks into the camera. His dark eyes narrow, and his lips tighten around his cigarillo.
The Slinger – Steel, I know you’re called the “impact player” . Well, let me tell you this son, there’s only gonna be 2 impacts tomorrow night. One is the Six Shooter impacting your face, and the second is you impacting the canvas. I assure you Mr. Steel, that I CAN beat you, and that’s fact, not fiction. As a matter of FACT, you will feel the FRICTION – of my grinding your face into the mat.
The Slinger shoots back his tequila, half-turns, and throws his shotglass into the fireplace, where it shatters into a million fragments.
Fade to Black…………
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