run away to nowhere (mindless ramblings) -- xfree willx

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Subject: run away to nowhere (mindless ramblings)

Author:
~*~

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Date Posted: 04:53:39 11/05/01 Mon

laughter fills the room,
reminding me of the joy i don't have.
their smiles making me feel
as if it's the world i lack.

i don't want laughter
i don't want smiles
just to be loved.
but i might as well ask for the stars...
...and i know those are already hers.

my heart is twisting inside,
contorting into the hideous shapes
of sorrow and hopelessness
before breaking into a thousand pieces.

my solitary love will destroy me...
and you won't even notice i'm gone.

you, so near but so very far.
i can't stand inbetween.
feeling torn, i can barely breathe
i know i'll suffocate unless i leave.

sitting in this empty parking lot
is better than sitting in there with them
laughing while i die
and smiling, wishing i could cry.

i disappear
into this cold and empty place,
and collapse on the gravel
as i think of your face.
at least i know here
that everything is real.
here, i know i can let myself feel.

here, i can be me
and wish i were someone else...
someone you would adore.
and just be glad,
that i don't have to look
at you not looking at me,
cuz i can't take it anymore.

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