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Date Posted: 20:12:12 08/13/22 Sat
Author: Curious
Author Host/IP: 120.159.212.179
Subject: Re: Story Inspiration Sources (The AWS Material, Part One)
In reply to: Curious 's message, "Story Inspiration Sources (Relaunch)" on 03:11:00 03/06/22 Sun

What follows is part one of a tranch of material I copied from the old Cigrarettereviews forum before that disappeared.

The posters 'nym' featured the initials AWS, but I forgot to make a note of the full posting name. The material is somewhat repetitive as they came from multiple thread posts made by this poster but could prove inspiring in various ways.

I'm posting it here as I think it worth preserving.

Part One

-------------------------------------------
AWS: (Have You Helped Anyone Start Smoking)

I haven't helped anyone start smoking, necessarily, but perhaps something similar.

After my first semester of college, I was home for Christmas break. I went with my mom to visit her side of the family for a few days. It's a three hour drive or so and usually I'd just ride with her. This time, however, we drove separately, as I'd have to leave before she did in order to go visit my dad's side of the family later that week.

Our first night in town, we went and met up with the family at a local bar/restaurant we always go to for get-togethers. My younger cousin was supposed to be there who I hadn't seen in many years. She was a year or two younger than me, so 16 going on 17. I was 18 at the time and as such, I was an open smoker. My mom had quit, but my aunt and my other (older) cousin both still smoked, as well as a woman my uncle had just recently gotten engaged to.

So we spent most of the evening eating and chatting. It was a smoke-friendly place, so I was smoking cigarettes here and there. The owners of the place were very close to my uncle, so I was able to have a couple of beers as well. My younger cousin was sitting next to me and we spent some time catching up. She never said anything about my smoking.

After a little over two hours or so, some of the adults were supposed to go to some other bar that was strictly 21 and up, which meant my younger cousin and I wouldn't be going. This was the usual tradition every holiday get-together. I'd go stay at my uncle's or aunt's house on my own while everyone else went out. This time, of course, my younger cousin had to accompany me. Once everyone got up to leave, my uncle asked if my cousin could ride with me so he wouldn't have to drop her off on his way out. I obliged, of course.

My cousin and I leave the restaurant and hop into my car. It was a 10 minute ride or so to my uncle's house from there. After getting on the road, I pull out my pack of cigarettes and politely ask her if she minds if I smoke. She said she didn't mind, so I light up a cigarette. It was my last cigarette, so I mention that I need to make a stop at a gas station and pick up a pack. After I parked at the gas station, I asked if she needed anything while I ran inside. She said she didn't, so I darted inside, got a fresh pack of cigarettes, and hopped back in the car.

I lit up yet another cigarette between the gas station and my uncle's house as we continued making small talk and catching up. Eventually, she remarked, "I didn't know you smoked." I smiled and shrugged and said, "Runs in the family, I guess." At this point, I figured if my cousin smoked, she would've said something at this point. I had started smoking somewhat regularly at her age and knew what it was like being in the closet about it with regards to the family, but I was never fortunate enough to have only a slightly-older cousin who might actually be cool with it. I mean, we just under two years apart in age, so it's not like there was any significant age difference. If we happened to live in the same state, I'm sure our respective groups of friends would've overlapped in some areas. But since she never said anything, I just assumed she wasn't a smoker.

Once we arrived at my uncle's house (her dad), we stepped inside and I turned on the TV to watch some football. She said she was going to go upstairs and call her boyfriend. I told her if I wasn't here when she got back, that I'd probably be outside on the patio.

About half an hour goes by and I was ready for another cigarette. I grabbed a beer from my uncle's refrigerator (which he generously offered me before we left the restaurant), opened the patio door, took a seat and lit up. I played around on my phone, finished my cigarette, but decided to stay outside and enjoy the unusually mild December weather. A few minutes after finishing the cigarette, I hear the patio door slide open as my cousin comes to join me. She takes a seat near me and we start making small talk again. She started telling me about her high school, her friends, boyfriend, where she wants to go to college, asking me about my college experience so far, etc. Eventually, I reach for my pack of cigarettes and lighter on the table and light up.

She gave me a curious look and managed to awkwardly stammer out, "Would you mind if I had one of your cigarettes?" Having been in her position before, I could tell how nervous she was just to ask me; that she had probably been wrestling with it all night since I was smoking next to her at the restaurant, in my car, and on the patio at that moment. I gave her a playfully puzzled look and ask, "So you smoke, too?" She gave an awkward smile, blushed, and said, "Sort of..."

She explained that she had tried smoking a year ago, as her mom (who my uncle had divorced many years ago when we were still children) was a smoker. Her mom had busted her one day after school sneaking a cigarette and was really upset. She didn't let her smoke, so my cousin still had to be sneaky about it. She said she wasn't able to steal a fresh pack from her mom before leaving for the airport to come visit for the holidays, so she had been wanting one for the past two days she had been in town but figured she'd have to survive until she got back home at the end of the week. She said she was afraid of what our family would think of her if they knew even though my mom smoked (or used to), my aunt smoke and my older cousin (her older sister) smoked more than anyone else.

I gladly offered her one of my own cigarettes. She lit up anxiously and I could tell she both needed it but was also not quite a "comfortable" smoker -- still inexperience and not at all confident with it. As such, I have her some pointers about inhaling, nose exhales, french inhales, etc. I also tried to teach her how to smoke with confidence, as she was smoking like someone was going to bust her at any second; like she was scared of being caught as a smoker. After she asked for another cigarette a few minutes later, I offered to go buy a pack for her instead, which she gladly accepted.

Later that evening, I told her how to "come out," as a smoker. See, once my family found out I smoked after I turned 18 and learned the full story (that I had been smoking since at least 16, and that I had hidden it from everyone every time I came to visit), they told me that I should've just been honest with them from the beginning. Specifically, my aunt (the non-smoking aunt) said, "We don't like that you smoke, honey, but we'd rather you be honest with us and be yourself around us rather than hide anything from us." I relayed that little tidbit to my cousin, who seemed pleasantly surprised.

The next day, I decided to ease the process for her by breaking the news to my mom in private that my cousin smoked. She rolled her eyes, smiled and said she wasn't surprised, but WAS surprised that my older cousin (again, her sister) didn't already know.

Two days later when we had the actual, annual family Christmas party, my mom and I arrived at my uncle's house to see both my younger cousin and my older cousin openly smoking cigarettes on the back patio.

So, basically, I helped my younger cousin become an "open/proud" smoker when she otherwise would've continued being in the closet about it. :P

--------------------------------------
AWS (Watching Someone Become a Smoker)

Yeah, this seems to be universal amongst (almost) all smokers. Even happened with me.

At 16-17 years old, I was in the car with a friend's mom. She lit up a cigarette and offered me one. I accepted, of course. She'd been giving and buying cigarettes for me for almost two years at that point, but I'd only recently become a more "regular" smoker. She knew that when on my own, I didn't necessarily smoke EVERY day (most days of the week, sure, but not every day), but she asked me how much I'd been smoking lately. I told her I had smoked basically every day for the past month and a half or so. She laughed and said she had been wondering how long it would take until I was hooked. I tried to play it off and say I wasn't physically hooked yet, I had just started being bolder about when and how often I'd smoke at home, even with my parents in the house. I reminded her I'd only ever had one intense, physical craving so far one day while I was at school, but that had been many months prior and I hadn't experienced anything like it since.

She asked me how many cigarettes a day I'd been smoking since I had start smoking every day. I sort of bashfully said between 1-3, but she laughed again and said that was a lie. She was right. I said 5-6, maybe a little more, especially when my parents weren't home or were fast asleep in the evenings. She said, "Sweetie, you're definitely hooked. Welcome to the club!"

I found out a short time later how right she was. Maybe her bringing it up is what made me realize it, because it was only a couple days later that I started waking up in the morning NEEDING a cigarette right away. After that, I knew I was fully committed, so the number of cigarettes began gradually picking up over the following weeks. I was addicted, so screw it, right? Went from 5-6 a day, to half a pack, to near a pack to a full pack in the ensuing months.

--------------------------------
AWS (Curious current non-smoker)

My situation was similar in some ways. The most obvious difference is that my parents (and other family members) smoked when I was growing up, but beyond just having an attraction to it/curiosity about it, in some ways I always felt like I was a smoker before ever even trying a cigarette. I'd get "cravings," that weren't literal, actual cravings, but this state of mind where I'd continually fantasize about what it'd be like if I could smoke. The only way out of that state of mind was to distract myself. So in a way, they were mental cravings, I guess, and eventually (when I was 12-13 years old), they were "intense," enough that I finally broke down and gave smoking a shot.

Here's the thing, though: you seem to be under the impression that if you try smoking and like it, you'll be instantly hooked. That's not necessarily true. It'll take some time of consistent smoking in certain amounts per day before you're physically addicted. I know and have known people who always have a pack of cigarettes on them (or at least keep one at home or in their car) who MAYBE smoke one, two, three cigarettes a day (at most) and regularly go entire days without smoking and they've done it that way for YEARS. They never "need" a cigarette, don't wake up dying for a cigarette first thing in the morning or anything like that, they just enjoy the occasional cigarette with a drink or to wind down after a long day and they leave it at that. Some of these people are also what I would consider to be hardcore athletes and/or health nuts, with the occasional cigarette being their lone vice/guilty pleasure that in no way affects their fitness/workout routine. Hell, one of the girls I know who is usually a 1-2 cigarette a day smoker recently ran and completed a 10k marathon (she's an obsessive runner). She stopped smoking at all in the three weeks leading up to the marathon, "just to be safe," though I doubt a smoking habit that small would've made a damn bit of difference given that she runs literally every day after work.

Point being, it's not like you're making a commitment or passing a point of no return by just trying a cigarette. It's highly unlikely you'll be addicted even after you go through your first pack. That level of addiction builds up over time and with routine. The thing to look out for if you want to avoid slipping into a regular habit beyond one or two a day is incorporating smoking into your daily routines, such as smoking every time you get in your car to head to work, on your way home from work, right before bed, right after lunch and/or dinner. Those simple, mundane, everyday activities become "triggers," for actual smokers like me and probably everyone on this forum, so when we do those things, we immediately want a cigarette even if we don't necessarily "need," one. The association between smoking and those activities is so regular and so ingrained that it feels strange and wrong not to have a cigarette when doing them.

So if it's something that has sat on your mind this long and to the point that you're making a post like this, there's (practically) zero harm in trying it. You might not even like it (plenty of smokers don't like it the first time or even first few times they try smoking, by the way)! But if you do like it, it's entirely possible to lead an otherwise healthy lifestyle so long as you use some self-control. Physical addiction is not something that happens instantly or quickly, but as I said above, the "routines," aspect of smoking is what can hasten it.

Also, unless you start seriously smoking HEAVILY a lot of the daily/regular health concerns I've seen you mention won't really be a factor. I'm sure it depends on the individual, but I've been smoking a pack a day for years and while I'm certainly far more out of shape than non-smokers, I still go on the occasional run and rarely if ever have a "smoker's cough," unless I'm already sick with the cold or something.

I should also mention that although I first tried smoking when I was 12-13 years old and would smoke periodically over the following years, I didn't become a regular/daily smoker until I was 17. So I "smoked," without being an actual/regular smoker for 4-5 years (I was very into and serious about sports in high school). I'd go days without a cigarette without issue and only ever smoked just because I felt like it/the opportunity was there.

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