Re: Eleonora, re: manipulation, etc. PS -- Let's Talk Spanking

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Subject: Re: Eleonora, re: manipulation, etc. PS

Author:
ZOE - re: dark years, etc.

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Date Posted: 19:45:24 02/15/26 Sun
In reply to: Zoe 's message, "Re: Eleonora, re: manipulation, etc. PS" on 17:33:09 02/10/26 Tue

Hi Zoe, it’s nice to hear things are going well!

I feel lucky that my mom and I are in a good place now. But I can’t help thinking that if we’d communicated better during my pre- and teen years things would have gone smoother then, and possibly going off to college would have had a better outcome. I needed her so much during those years, but ended up pushing her away. And she thought she was giving me room to find myself, when I was actually losing myself. But I don’t blame myself, or her. She didn’t understand what I was going through, and I didn’t have the emotional maturity to express what I was feeling.

Caity

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Replies:

[> [> [> [> [> Subject: ZOE - Re: dark years, etc

Author:
Caitlyn
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Date Posted: 19:54:21 02/15/26 Sun

Hi Zoe (again)!

I'm reposting this because I posted it under the title I wanted to post it as, rather than my name....

Hi Zoe, it’s nice to hear things are going well!

I feel lucky that my mom and I are in a good place now. But I can’t help thinking that if we’d communicated better during my pre- and teen years things would have gone smoother then, and possibly going off to college would have had a better outcome. I needed her so much during those years, but ended up pushing her away. And she thought she was giving me room to find myself, when I was actually losing myself. But I don’t blame myself, or her. She didn’t understand what I was going through, and I didn’t have the emotional maturity to express what I was feeling.

Caity

[> [> [> [> [> [> Subject: Re: ZOE - Re: dark years, etc
Author: Caity [ Edit \| View ]	Date Posted: 14:46:45 02/16/26 Mon You do have a very healthy attitude about possible regrets, in any case. Facing the past bad has always been a very delicate balance I think. I think sometimes things seem so very clear in hindsight, when our previous selves probably had better points!

[> [> [> [> [> [> [> Subject: LOL
Author: Zoe [ Edit \| View ]	Date Posted: 15:12:42 02/16/26 Mon Now I've done the same thing. HAHA.

[> [> [> [> [> [> [> Subject: Re: ZOE - Re: dark years, etc
Author: Caitlyn [ Edit \| View ]	Date Posted: 06:12:06 02/17/26 Tue Maybe that makes us great minds! If great minds think alike they'd also make the same mistakes, right? Caity

[> [> [> [> [> [> [> Subject: PS Re: ZOE - Re: dark years, etc
Author: Caitlyn [ Edit \| View ]	Date Posted: 10:18:39 02/17/26 Tue Therapy's made all the difference for me, I think. The informal therapy of this forum, especially while I was living at home after the disaster of my first college year, really helped, and going to professional therapy since I've been in California has been invaluable. Caity

[> [> [> [> [> [> [> [> Subject: Re: PS Re: ZOE - Re: dark years, etc

Author:
Zoe
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Date Posted: 17:55:00 02/18/26 Wed

Caity,

Of course we are great minds, but we don't make mistakes, we just develop our genius intermittently and with unforeseen results!

I know what you mean about the importance of informal therapy, and just having people to talk with who won't judge you and do and understand your circumstances. Really the therapy group I was in when I was younger, the group of girls was way more valuable than the therapist. Honestly I think she was often overwhelmed by us, not that she was totally useless but I think she wasn't ready for the depth and range of issues--sometimes I think we were assuring her she was alright.