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Subject: Re: PR

Author:
Dennis S. Vogel
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Date Posted: 09:56:14 04/17/04 Sat
In reply to: george 's message, "PR" on 14:41:55 03/27/04 Sat

Hi George,

Thank you for the suggestion.
Maybe it's my time with WZ.com as a WZard coming back (was it that long ago?), but I focused on a particular web page - http://www.matrixmarketinggroup.com/top10.htm

Hi Giant Crushers,
Here's a different list, each month, of things people can act on to improve their businesses.
I also looked at their brochure - http://www.matrixmarketinggroup.com/MMG2003.pdf
This is a good example - template - showing what brochures & other marketing messages should communicate. I think it should have more focus on prospective clients - a YOU focus.
Example- "Matrix Marketing Group unlocks the profitable growth potential in companies. We specialize in helping startup and small businesses to improve business performance
and maximize revenue by increasing their return on their sales and marketing investments."

Should be something like: "Your company has profitable growth potential waiting to be unlocked. Matrix Marketing Group specializes in helping businesses like yours - startup and small businesses - improve business performance
and maximize revenue by increasing your return on your sales and marketing investments."

Does my rewrite pull you in more?

Dennis S. Vogel
When you use the right strategies & tactics
your giant competitors can't step on you.
What you need is here:
http://www.thrivingbusiness.homestead.com/
http://www.voy.com/31049/

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>Hi George, > >Thank you for the suggestion. >Maybe it's my time with WZ.com as a WZard coming back >(was it that long ago?), but I focused on a particular >web page - >http://www.matrixmarketinggroup.com/top10.htm > >Hi Giant Crushers, >Here's a different list, each month, of things people >can act on to improve their businesses. >I also looked at their brochure - >http://www.matrixmarketinggroup.com/MMG2003.pdf >This is a good example - template - showing what >brochures & other marketing messages should >communicate. I think it should have more focus on >prospective clients - a YOU focus. >Example- "Matrix Marketing Group unlocks the >profitable growth potential in companies. We >specialize in helping startup and small businesses to >improve business performance >and maximize revenue by increasing their return on >their sales and marketing investments." > >Should be something like: "Your company has profitable >growth potential waiting to be unlocked. Matrix >Marketing Group specializes in helping businesses like >yours - startup and small businesses - improve >business performance >and maximize revenue by increasing your return on your >sales and marketing investments." > >Does my rewrite pull you in more? > >Dennis S. Vogel >When you use the right strategies & tactics >your giant competitors can't step on you. >What you need is here: >http://www.thrivingbusiness.homestead.com/ >http://www.voy.com/31049/

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