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Date Posted: 12:24:34 01/14/02 Mon
Author: Liz
Author Host/IP: 12.31.208.217
Subject: A fine line between narcissism and depression
In reply to: gem 's message, "Are depressed people narcissitic??" on 13:51:08 01/13/02 Sun

This is my opinion - your mileage may vary.

While depression often involves self-hate and narcissism is defined as self-love, love and hate are not opposites. Some would argue that you can't hate what you do not love - at most you'd merely be indifferent.

I think narcissism and depression can co-exist.

The narcissist, by loving him/herself, deprives him/herself of intimacy with others. Some might say the narcissist always wakes up with his/her lover - but in another way, he/she also always wakes up alone.

How lonely it must be to be the one who loves yourself best, to be the only one deserving of your own love. If no one else is good enough - for you to love or to love you - then life must be lived very solitarily.

Depression of course makes us self-absorbed. When one is in such acute pain it is very hard to think about much else. On 9-11 I was unable to feel any real empathy for those in the WTC (other than wishing I was there). My own stupid little pain, like a hangnail or a toothache, drowned out all the huge and overwhelming pain in the world.

I cried more for me than for the wives and husbands and children and mothers and fathers and sisters and brothers and lovers. Does that make me a narcissist? An egotist? I don't know.

At least, I don't think they are mutually exclusive.

Liz

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Replies:

  • Re: Are depressed people narcissitic?? -- donna, 12:32:53 01/14/02 Mon
  • Re: Great feedback! -- gem, 13:54:29 01/14/02 Mon
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