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Date Posted: 00:06:37 07/19/01 Thu
Author: Bill
Author Host/IP: 209.240.220.167
Subject: What more can I do

I feel like I'm just rehashing but there are changes and a coming major turn in the tide I feel is now necessary, and I'm feeling very overwhelmed but
feeling I'm doing what I have to do.

I am caught up in some kind of political game at work, it's who see can turn their resignation in fastest. I held off from telling my supervisor about my possible plans when he confided he was looking into an another job (which he didn't take), I was going to reveal my fall plans to move but held off when on top of our Employee/Infection Control LPN who is moving to Washington, our Director of Nursing and Rehabilitation Manager resigned.
I will NOT go into the sensory overload, financial problems, resident death and suffering, and employee drama that has me sucked in over my head, I've talked about that for a long time now, but what's new is that now our boss has crossed the line and made one too many crude jokes to the female staff. The medical records
clerk went home in tears and her son came in and confronted the boss yesterday, or rather tried to physically attack him, he charged past me and slammed the door and I could hear through that near sound proof door yelling and things falling and slamming. It triggered me into recalls of some family violence in my past, but I dealt with it in the personnel manager's office privately while she intervened and saved the son from being arrested, he lunged, knocked some things over, luckily no fight, but now it's all over the facility that our boss is a sexual deviant and that's all I've had is people up at the front desk on top of everything else asking me, so what do you think, did he do it? I say I don't know anything and try to get back to work.
He has contacted the mrc and said he will do what it takes to have her back and he apologizes, whether he's sincere I hope he is, but it's not the main issue here.
With the facility and spreading to community talk, and suspicion now on most female minds at work, I feel he will resign and quickly.
Which leaves me in the position of quitting most likely after he does and it's a toss up if he does. It's the game now, who can turn in their resignation quickest.
I have a couple of confidantes at work who know how long I've been planning this, and they've agreed to help back me, I feel for my very sanity, I am forced to make a move and turn in my notice Monday morning stating I give them five weeks until August 31st to find a replacement. This will bring it into the open, and spark me to make it past this awful work mess and make my desired fall move happen. And lessen the drama if things with our boss go sour.
This is my plan:
I have lists of places/people to contact for address change, people to talk to about utilities change, the vet to talk to about the cats and how to make the transition easier for them, I am making now job worksheets of places to apply and step by step what I need to do to research, get more jobs to apply for,
I'm atleast now receiving some rejections, atleast they acknowledged me, that is something nowdays, and I'm
also starting work via phone apt. with an appointed human resource director I found within a website to help me with resumes and my job search. I am financially planning to take savings, some available credit, and a final paycheck for getting established (bank, changing car tags, license, etc.) I am also creating a relocation manual starting with directions there and where places are, timelines for changes that need to be done, lists of places to go to get things in place. I am also writing the main counseling agency introducing myself and letting them know what the situation is so that when I arrive, they will know ahead of time I might have fears about settling in a new town and I will have this in place, also want to see about stress meds if necessary, which means establishing a doctor. I am gearing for a month long, two job per DAY application blitz, online, snail mail, via phone, what it takes, constant research and a constant flow of job searching right up if need be when I leave with a list of places to apply when I hit town.
I want to be as independent as possible in this move, although I will tell you all here Sandy has been the best help of a friend I could ask for. Her e-mails of job sites, snail mail packages of phone books, maps, directions, and their offer of a much less in cost temporary home for me has helped me more than words can say here. I truly feel this is saving me from a negative situation.
It's all I can do to go outdoors after work.
I'm going to be working my tial off these next five weeks, but I am just to the point I feel my resignation is necessary to swing things in motion,
steer me towards making changes and away from the obsession of the drama and endless positive, but negative feedback at work I'll endure at work until the day I leave, and to honestly protect myself from worse happenings as it will be a miracle now if my boss stays after the things said today. It's almost like beating something to the pass to give me enough breathing room to shoot through the door out of here with a little less stress towards a new life because I'm at my limits now.
I'm resigning Monday with notice and will put this plan I have into motion and hope all works out. I've ridden this work rollercoaster for as long as I can trying to do the "right thing".
Thanks for listening,
Bill
P.S.
I'm even going to send a portfolio of some writings
and an question if it's ok to share in some editorials in the Aiken paper visions of a Kansas man's new life making a big move to the South Carolina and his interpretation of the positive he sees.
Friends, I'm trying anything I can here! I figure subtly, but in determined fashion integrating myself into the community along with Sandy and Scott's great friendship is the best way to go.
I wrote this to avoid a panic attack of uncertainty
after the last two days at work and this crossroads I hit tonight.
God, this is ridiculous, I feel like I'm Scarlet O Hara making some grand exit and being the martyr and dramatic, but I didn't know where else to go and wanted to spill this entire load because I'm very overwhelmed and want to move forward.

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