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Date Posted: 00:52:00 12/21/02 Sat
Author: Cindy
Subject: Need avice

In August, I started using meth. For you who don't know what that is, here are some other names for it. (Meth, dope, shit, crystal, ICE, speed) Since August I have lost 31 lbs. and I love it. But, now I am an addict and trying to quit.

Well, the guy who first offered it to me is this guy I am in love with. He is also an addict, but I didn't find this out until just recently when I admitted to him that I am an addict.

Anyway, I am in love with this guy. I mean, I love him so much. I care so much about him. I know he uses drugs to escape his pain and his past. He is what you would call a "thug". He has lived a hard life. He has seen peopel die right in front of him, he has beat the crap out of women over drug money that was owed to him(which he regrets very much), and he has been a little on the poor side(except when dealing).

He always talks about quitting the drugs and the fast life. He doesn't want it anymore, but he can't really get away from it because most of his family lives the fast/drug life and he can't leave his family because he loves them too much and he knows he isn't strong enough to get away from it and still have it in his face.

I have talked to him about getting back into school and getting his dilpoma(he dropped out last year). He really wants to and I know he does. He sees his brother's life going to hell and he doesn't want that for himself.

I know and he knows that to get away from "that kind" life, he needs to stop the drug use. Well, me, knowing how difficult it is to stop using meth, and knowing that he is much more addicted then I am, I think it will be very difficult for him to quit on his own, and his pride is much to big to admit himself into a rehab.

I try talking to him about it, but he doesn't really listen to me and no one else. Everyone has lost faith in him. Me and one other girl are the only two people left on earth with faith in him. I don't think we are enough to get him on the right track. I don't want to give up on him, but I don't know what else to do.

He is a very smart guy with so much ahead of him. He has so much potential and I see it. He just went down the wrong path in life and I am trying to get him back on the right path, but it is very difficult.

I think I may be losing faith in him as well. I really don't want to. If I do, then who else will he have? He will just go stright to hell. I know it isn't my respnsibilty, but I feel it is. He is my friend and I care. If God didn't want me to help him, then why else would we have met?

I don't know what to do. I really need some sort of advice. I feel so stuck. What else can I do?

In drug terms, "I am scrapping the pipe for that little bit extra that I missed."

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