Unlikely Marriages -- The Mad Wee Wee

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Date Posted: 12:09:42 01/03/02 Thu
Author: Jade
Subject: Unlikely Marriages

If Kitty Carlisle married Conway Twitty, she'd be Kitty Twitty.

If Yoko Ono married Sonny Bono,she'd be Yoko Ono Bono.

If Dolly Parton married Salvador Dali,she'd be Dolly Dali.

If Bo Derek married Don Ho,she'd be Bo Ho.

If Oprah Winfrey married Depak Chopra,she'd be Oprah Chopra.

If Cat Stevens married Snoop Doggy Dogg,(hey! it's the '90's!),
he'd be Cat Doggy Dogg.

If Olivia Newton-John married Wayne Newton,then divorced him to
marry Elton John, she'd be Olivia Newton-John Newton John.

If Sondra Locke married Elliott Ness, then divorced him to marry
Herman Munster, she'd become Sondra Locke Ness Munster.

If Bea Arthur married Sting, she'd be Bea Sting.

If Liv Ullman married Judge Lance Ito, then divorced him and
married Jerry Mathers, she'd be Liv Ito Beaver.

If Snoop Doggy Dogg married Winnie the Pooh, he'd be Snoop Doggy
Dogg Pooh.

How about a baseball marriage? If Boog Powell married Felipe
Alou, he'd be Boog Alou.

If G. Gordon Liddy married Boutros-Boutros Ghali, then divorced
him to marry Kenny G., he'd be G. Ghali G.

Nog (Quark's brother on "Star Trek: Deep Space Nine") has no
other name, so he uses it twice when getting a marriage license.
If he married Howard Hughes, and then Pamela Dare, he'd be Nog
Nog Hughes Dare.

If Shirley Jones married Tom Ewell, then Johnny Rotten, then
Nathan Hale, she'd be Shirley Ewell Rotten Hale.

If Ivana Trump married, in succession, Orson Bean (actor), King
Oscar (of Norway), Louis B. Mayer (of MGM), and Norbert Wiener
(mathematician), she would then be Ivana Bean Oscar Mayer Wiener.

If Woody Allen married Natalie Wood, divorced her and married
Gregory Peck, divorced him and married Ben Hur, he'd be Woody
Wood Peck Hur.

If Dolly Parton married Tommy Smothers, then went even further
back in show business and married Mr. Lucky, then divorced and
married Martin Short, then divorced and married football kicker
Ray Guy, we could all nod understandingly when we heard, "Dolly
Parton Smothers Lucky Short Guy."

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