aight.. -- Stezo 2001 "Dedicated to the New Generation"

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Subject: aight..

Author:
911 a.k.a. Play

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Date Posted: 09:36:57 06/23/01 Sat
Author Host/IP: spider-wg081.proxy.aol.com/205.188.196.56
In reply to: The Reckless Villain 's message, "AYO PEEP THIS RATE AND REPLY" on 18:22:44 06/22/01 Fri

aight i liked the subject n the way you worded some things but you need to elevate your vocab a lil.. stayed on topic decently.. i would consider it a decent post.. just read others n take the critisim like it is constructive n helping you to become an elevated emcee.. peace

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[> Subject: you lost me once or twice but fuck it it was ill and deep too 8/10 rate me and d lyric collab

Author:
excellence
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Date Posted: 10:57:09 06/23/01 Sat
Author Host/IP: spider-th044.proxy.aol.com/152.163.213.64

>ayo im lookin for some constructive criticism so i can
>elevate my rhymes
>
>when i shut my eyes there aint no light at the end of
>the path/
>all i see is the pain and destruction that will be
>faced in the aftermath/
>there will be constant and ever present commotion/
>all i can see is flames covering lands vaster than the
>oceans/
>were we warned by witchdoctors who concoted numerous
>potions and elixers/
>there is no way out of this future there are no one
>step fixers/
>but i am comforted by the fact that i will reign over
>this land/
>me standing next to satans right hand/
>inflicting his torture on each and every bystander/
>in this land of death im the general the colonel and
>the commander/
>but until this prophecy becomes fulfilled/
>i have been granted the power to unleach this terror
>on any emcee at will/
>most of them fall to the fatal sin of underestimating
>my skill/
>i leave em broken bruised and with bones that are
>shattered/
>any witnesses "no" they saw my fury and they scattered/
>in numerous directions, that cant be counted/
>just like the skills of that poor soul that will never
>be ammounted/
>because he will not live to battle another day/
>after each opponent i conquer, their lives i take away/
>pretty soon i will be the one and only man standing
>upright/
>i'll lift my hands to the sky and be taken home to my
>eternal night/