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Date Posted: 18:52:48 02/02/00 Wed
Author: Jake Blade
Subject: IcE, White Devil, and Road Dogg READ!



[The scene opens in an airport. The camera spans out around the airport, spotting tons of people walking around, looking for terminals. But then the camera spots a man in a leather coat and some black baggy pants in a pure sprint. The man is none other than Jake Blade. He is followed closely by Tanya Moore. Who has a leather coat on and some sunglasses. It's pretty obvious they're late for their flight. Jake arrives at his terminal and hands the ticket to the lady standing there. She looks at the ticket, looks back up, and frowns. She hands back his ticket.]

Counter Lady:
I'm sorry, but due to harsh weather conditions we've been having the past couple of days, I'm afriad this flight has been cancelled. Sorry.

Jake Blade:
WHAT?!? This is supposed to be my FIRST televised match and your telling me that my flight is f*cking cancelled?!?!?!?

Counter Lady:
I'm afraid so.

Jake Blade:
Stop saying that!

[Jake stomps around a bit more, but then goes and sits down on in a chair. He opens his bag and pulls out an "Inside Wrestling" magazine with the heading "HWF: Why is it on top?" on it. Tanya comes running over to him with her high heels in her hand.]

Tanya Moore:
*gasp* What's going on?

Jake Blade:
Flight's cancelled. Take a seat.

[Tanya sighs and takes a seat next to Jake. Jake looks up and is startled byt the camera. He looks around a bit more then decides to cut a promo.]

Jake Blade:
Well, since I'm stuck in this damn airport, which I might add smells like urine, I might as well cut a promo. First up, IcE. Now, you have finally grown a pair of balls and accepted my challenge. It's about friggin' time. I've waited about a week and you didn't show up. But I guess I got you out of your hiding place with my firey words and now you've decided to step into the ring with a real contender. Oh wait, it looks like it's not a ring, but a Hell in a Cell match. Well, well. I guess that means the odds are stacked against you. If you people didn't know out there, Hell in a Cell matches are my specialty. I have never lost one, nor will I ever. And most people don't quite understand why I'm so good at them. I'm not exceptionally strong, but yet I kick everyone's ass that steps into one with me. And IcE, if you have doubts about what I'm saying, believe every word of it. You will feel my wrath come Redemption '00. And what a way to kick off my career. A Hell in a Cell match at the PPV against a jobber named IcE! My debut woulda been tomorrow if it wasn't for this weather. But back to the subject of IcE. IcE, people overlook my quite often. They just see me and don't pay attention to what I can do in the ring. And, since you've been in the game for so long, I'm sure you know that so I'm not going into in-depth explination of all that. So, old man. You wanted some of Jake Blade, your going to get some of Jake Blade. Hell, you'll get the whole thing. And it's four days and counting. This Sunday is the day. The day of Redemption for me, for the NWD, and for the HWF. They've been longing for new talent and not the same of schtick like IcE, and now that they have it, they're running with it. Jake Blade vs. IcE in a Hell in a Cell match. WHOO!!! This is going to be an event you'll never EVER forget! You know why, IcE? Because I'm a cut above the rest!!!

[Jake Blade all of a sudden gets up and starts to walk away. Tanya jumps out of her seat and follows close behind. The camera man is soon hot on his heels as well. Jake looks at all of the restauraunts and sees a Dairy Queen. He budges in front of everyone in line and asks for a little bit of ice cream. He gets it and they go back and sit down He takes a couple licks and stops. He twirls it around in his hand and quickly crushes it. Ice cream oozes all over his hand and onto the carpet. He looks back up at the camera.]

Jake Blade:
IcE, if you were smart enough to make the reference to you there, you would see how seriously I am taking this match. This isn't going to be some fruity walk in the park like most of your other matches that "pushed you to the top". This is going to be alot of blood, sweat, and tears. In your case, triple all three of those. And for my case, divide them in half. This may not be a work out for me, but it's sure gonna be a helluva lotta fun! I'm going to make your old-ass suffer in that Cell! I'm going to throw you from the top allllll the way to the bottom. I'll use you, abuse you, and promptly lock the Final Breath on until you drift out of conciousness. And if you don't believe me, look at tapes from crappy indy wrestling feds. You will see people being ripped limb from damn limb. All by me, the Millennium Man!!!! And I'm reminded of a good buddy of mine that was in this fed quite a while ago, he's also in the hall of fame! You may know him IcE! Mayth Duval? Ring a bell? Yeah, he beat your ass when he was in here! Which makes me think that I can do the same!!!!

[Jake realizes that he spilled ice cream all over his leather jacket. He silently curses at himself and takes the jacket off. Under the jacket he has a NWD shirt.]

Jake Blade:
I'm having a bad day. And it was even worse when I saw that White Devil, the most pathetic excuse for a wrestler in the HWF, decided to taunt the HWF. The comes out here with his "scary" facepaint and acts all tough, like he can beat on the NWD without any problem. Well, Whitey, I have one thing to say to you and thats... "shut up!" You suck! You don't have what it takes to beat any member of the NWD. Not Reznor, not McBain, not Joker. And no... definitely not ME! If you want some, come get it, but don't hide behind your mommy's skirt waiting for her to yell at us because we beat your ass. You have to learn to stick up for yourself! I can't believe you, of all people, had the balls to make fun of the NWD! You, the man who hasn't beaten anyone worth mentioning for about a year now, telling the NWD that they suck! Jeez! You have one large pair of them right there slapnutz! You come out, call the crowd the same name over and over and think your pretty damn bad. Well you aren't. You suck, so screw you! You call the crowd, MY LOYAL FANS, Pollocks and stupid stuff like that. Do you think that hurts them? Yoiu think they hate you because you make fun of them? Well I'll tell you this, they don't hate you because of that! They hate you because you have no talent and because of that should be shot. Then secondly, last time you cut a promo, you told the crowd to "f*ck up". What the hell is that? You think your pretty original don't you? You come out here and state some names of NWD members, but leave me out. You make reference to me as a "Poofter"...

[Jake stares into the camera with a confused look on his face.]

Jake Blade:
That's really retarded right there. Then you say, AND I QUOTE: "all of you nwd pillocks can stick as far as I'm concerened". That is really dumb right there. Stick what? And if you add a little comment after it I'm sure that the NWD could just as easily turn that object right back at you and stick it up your ass. You say that if we have a problem with you we can come to the ring and settle it like real men. Well, slapnutz, bring... it... on. I'll be waiting in this airport tomorrow morning, and by that time I'd better have my damn answer!!!

[Jake looks out the window. He sees that it's pitch black out. He checks his watch. It's 11:25. He yawns. He looks back at the camera.]

Jake Blade:
And now, Road Dogg, I'm not finished with you yet. No, just because the IcE Man accepted my challenge doesn't mean your off the hook. Not by a long shot. I'm sick of seeing you come to the ring everyday with the same old routine everytime. And I want to stop that. After I finish with IcE, and then hopefully White Devil, I'm coming after your a-little-to-happy-to-suck ass. You come out all smiles, you act like you don't take this seriously. But I do! I take it dead serious. And I don't like it when people come out all smiles. It makes me think that you are disrespecting me. And I don't like to be disrespected. You got that??? I'm going to rip those little dreads off the back of your head and feed them to you. I'll stick them so far down your doggie throat you'll be acting like a cat and coughing up hair balls! That was really cheap... but who cares? I'm still better than you!!! And the whole fed knows it. If you wanna pick a little fight, go pick on a jobber your own size. But if you wanna start a WAR! Keep trying to act big about me! That's all I have to say! Now go away so I can sleep!

[The camera man turned off the camera and walked away. Jake sighed and turned over and fell asleep. The scene fades to black...]



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