| Subject: Johnny and the Bear |
Author:
Wanda
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Date Posted: 17:06:35 05/04/02 Sat
Author Host/IP: 204-181-87-30.cis.net/204.181.87.30
Johnny and the Bear
Johnny was a boy of eight
never closed a door or gate
played alone after school
had a real need to be cool
Ben Cool Cat lived next door
had a motor bike to adore
combed his hair with style
teased Johnny to get him riled
One day Cool Cat said to John
“Johnny come across the lawn;
let me teach you the rule
on how to become totally cool”
That news tickled Johnny’s ears
he had heard all the sneers
What caused Cool Cat to be nice
was his penchant for his vice
Cool Cat was a malicious sneak
He also had a mean streak
Johnny being young and naďve
saw not the contents of his sleeve
He pulled a bottle filled with gin
from his sleeve and gave a grin
“To be cool Johnny, take a drink
You’ll feel good; it’ll help you think”
Soon he gave Johnny another round
John liked this new friend he’d found
He would become like Ben Cool Cat
people would smile and tip their hat
Cool Cat plied Johnny with drink
he lost all ability to even think
He passed out and fell to the ground
and did not respond to light or sound
Cool Cat put Johnny in a car
then left the car in front of a bar
He jumped out and took off in a run
He was about to have some fun
The police came, found Johnny there
Johnny was in a state of despair
The car was stolen he was told
He might face jail till he was old
Johnny’s Dad came from work
where he served as a bank clerk
He was shocked to hear the news
about his son, a stolen car, and booze
Johnny told his Dad of the afternoon
Cool Cat had played him like a tune
There would need be some restitution
before any thoughts of absolution
Johnny knew about a fighting bear
His name was “Leg off will tear”
He called the owner on the phone
Might he have the bear on loan
Johnny explained his situation
and his need for compensation
The man laughed and shared a plan
all he needed was honey in a can
The next day Johnny was all set
He would enjoy seeing Cool Cat sweat
He called him over to the yard
Johnny could see he was on guard
John laughed and then he said
“Let’s on the wild side tread”
"What’d you say Johnny boy;
the wild side you enjoy”
"To you, I have something to show
inside the garage you must go
Step inside if you dare
for full effect, sit on the chair"
"Wear dark glasses; I will lead
I’ll leave the door open if you need"
Cool Cat accepted Johnny’s dare
He was led in and placed on a chair
From the honey can, Johnny poured
over Cool Cat’s shoulders to the floor
In through the door walked a huge bear
growling as he walked toward the chair
The closer he came, the larger Ben's eyes
He was ten times Cool Cat’s size
Cool Cat screamed, started to run
Now Johnny was the one having fun
The bear caught Cool Cat with his paws
He’d never seen such huge bear jaws
The bear began to lick at the honey
What Johnny saw was so funny
Cool Cat tried to run from the bear
The bear didn’t understand playing fair
He held Cool Cat down with one paw
He licked his hair, face, and jaw
Finally, the bear had eaten his fill
Out he walked to his master, Phil
Cool Cat was not so cool after all
He lay on the floor feeling a bit small
Johnny helped him stand and then said
Did you like “on the wild side” to tread
Cool Cat dropped his head and softly spoke
I’m sorry Johnny, I’ve been a 1st.class dope
I deserved the “what for” I got today
on you, a bad joke, I will never play
I don’t ever want to have to face that bear
I don’t have any hair or skin left to share
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