if any of ya'll are looking for a laugh....>>>>>> -- Out Of Character

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Subject: if any of ya'll are looking for a laugh....>>>>>>

Author:
.Cassius.

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Date Posted: 05:00:52 11/18/01 Sun

lol me luvs this!

GREAT TRUTHS ABOUT LIFE THAT LITTLE CHILDREN HAVE LEARNED

1) No matter how hard you try, you can�t baptize cats.
2) When your mom is mad at your dad, don�t let her brush your hair.
3) When your sister hits you, don�t hit her back; they always catch the second person.
4) You can�t trust dogs to watch your food.
5) Puppies still have bad breath even after eating a Tic Tac.
6) You can�t hide a piece of broccoli in a glass of milk.
7) Don�t wear polka-dot panties under white shorts.

GREAT TRUSTHS ABOUT LIFE THAT ADULTS HAVE LEARNED

1) Raising teenagers is like nailing Jell-O to a tree.
2) One reason to smile is that every seven minutes of every day someone in an aerobics class pulls a hamstring.
3) The best way to keep kids at home is to make a pleasant atmosphere (and let the air out of their tires)
4) Today�s mighty oak is just yesterday�s nut that held its ground.
5) My mind not only wanders; sometimes it leaves me completely.
6) If you remain calm, you just don�t have all the facts.
7) Insanity is hereditary � you get it from your kids.

GREAT TRUTHS ABOUT GROWING OLD

1) Growing old is mandatory; growing up is optional.
2) Insanity is my only means of relaxation.
3) Forget about the health food. I need all the preservative is can get.
4) Every time I think about exercise, I just lie down until the thought goes away.
5) God put me on earth to accomplish a certain number of things. Right now I�m so far behind I will live forever.
6) Its frustrating when you know all the answers but nobody bothers to ask you the questions.
7) I finally got my head together and my body fell apart.
8) There cannot be a crisis this week; my schedule is already full.
9) Just when I was getting used to yesterday, along comes today.
10) Age doesn�t always bring wisdom. Sometimes age comes alone.
11) Sometimes I think I understand everything, but then I regain consciousness.
12) I�ve seen it all, done it all, and can�t remember most of it.

THE FOUR STAGES OF LIFE
1) You do believe in Santa Claus.
2) You don�t believe in Santa Claus.
3) You are Santa Claus.
4) You look like Santa Claus.

(ya'll can copy and paste this into an e-mail if yas want!)

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