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Date Posted: 18:19:24 03/12/00 Sun
Author: Cyric Logan
Author Host/IP: NoHost / 212.43.170.130
Subject: An Afternoon with the FUTURE (RP)

(Everyone's hero, The FUTURE CYRIC LOGAN, suddenly appears on the screen, an extreme close-up of the CUTTING EDGE in wrestling technology looking into the camera lens from behind black sunglasses and brushing his hair with his hand taps one fingernail on the lens.)
LOGAN: You sure it's on?

CREW: Yup, yup, yup. Let's get this show on the road.

(Logan steps back from the camera, and has now removed his sunglasses and clipped them to the waist of his wrestling trunks.)

LOGAN: Welcome, one and all, to the latest, greatest evolution of the wrestling world!!

(LOGAN straightens out his t-shirt so that you can read the "The FUTURE" logo clearly)

Ahem, THE FUTURE!! Now, if you're so uncultured as to realize a good thing when it's smacking you right in the face, buddy-boy, let me tell you, I am better than good. I am bette than keen. Better than great. Better than super. In fact, I would even wager to say that I am better than most super-heroes... with the possible exception of Eat-Man -- I love that guy. So, the moment I make my debut, naturally, elite country clubs around the entire world start scrambling for the phones to try to convince me to join their selective roster. Since I am in the area the Central Louisiana Country Club gets to be lucky firsts. Get a shot of the place behind us there, Bo-bo.

(The camera pans to the left of Logan to get a shot of the enormous iron gate behind him.)

LOGAN: Basically, I'm just gonna go in and hob-nob with America's best....because you gotta agree I put the STUP in STUPENDOUS!! Now check out the digs here huh? WOWSERS....well even these back water little social clubs need to get a little class and who better on GODS GREEN earth is better than the FUTURE of Sports enteratinment to bring that little piece of class essential to all snobbish joints? HMMMMM........Oh well guess theres nothing else to do but knock the socks of the American social elite!!

(LOGAN walks off-camera and returns carrying a can of red spraypaint, LOGAN adjusts his shades and removes his jacket to reveal a new Tee. THE FUTURE)

Krist: Before we go in, I gotta take care of something. I mean, this is really buggin' me, you know. This place is called CLCC in English, but nobody cares about Central Louisiana.....

(LOGAN then proceeds to spraypaint all along the road leading up to the gate.)

LOGAN: THERE we go! CYRIC LOGAN Country Club. Now people might actually give a hoot. After you, buddy.

(LOGAN motions for CREW to go through the gates, then follows after him.)

LOGAN: HOLY CRAP BATMAN!! Check out the golf course!! PHEWWWWWW man I could really, really get into that!!

(Logan disappears off camera, and returns with a baseball stick)

LOGAN: Hey You!! Crew Guy! 10 bucks says I can bean that cart over there!!

CREW GUY: You're on!!

(LOGAN grabs a golfball from somewhere chucks it up and swings for all he's worth....the ball disappears from view...a moment later there is the harsh sound of breaking glass......LOGAN looks around and chucks the bat into a passing caddies club set)

LOGAN: OOOOPS!!! Alright don't look at me like that...I owe you ten bucks!! Come on lets get this boring appointment over with!

(The shot changes to one of Logan walking through The inside of
the country club. The decorations are a rich blend of Oriental and Western styles. LOGAN looks around with respect. He nods his head.)

LOGAN: Nice place they got here. I imagine if I were member, they'd probably try to keep me from doing all sorts of Ga-roovy things. PHEWWWWW!! Good thing I'm not, because there's something I really, REALLY gotta do...

(LOGAN points up at the ceiling and the camera follows his finger. The shot then cuts immediately to one of LOGAN swinging like a mad ape from the chandelier above. Logan waves down to the crew.)

LOGAN: This is GREAT! I don't know what I like more, going monkey-nuts on this chandelier or taking over The NACW.... quite possibly the chandelier!

(The shot changes as the camera comes to a room marked SAUNA there are wo doors one says somehting in Japanese, and so does the other...Logan looks into the camera shrugs and opens the first door,from inside there is the sound of women screaming...Logan smiles and walks in camera at the ready.....a woman in a towel yells something at Logan)

LOGAN: HEY YOU LISTEN LADY!! I am just trying to get intouch with my feminie side!! Besides you don't sign the doors right here!! ANYHOO I didn't think ladies were supposed to use language like THAT!! WOWSERS!! That was harsh!!

(A whole lotta female hands shove Logan right out the door, he looks into the camera and shrugs again...)

LOGAN: It wouldn't have been so bad if one of them had been cute!! MAN'O'MAN there were some UGGGGLY chicks in there!!

(LOGAN walks into a lounge/bar room where plenty of the idle rich sit on leather sofas drinking champagne and gin and tonic and eating cocktail shrimp and caviar. LOGAN plops down next to a young woman in a shiny red dress.)

LOGAN: Hey, baby, would you like a drink?

Chick: Sure. Thank you.

(LOGAN stands up and returns with a glass of champagne. He sits down on the sofa once more and promptly pours the champagne on his crotch, keeping as straight a face as he can.)

LOGAN: Here you go, drink up!

(Logan is heard yelling off-camera. The yell gets continually closer until, as the camera, panning across a grand hallway, comes to an enormous stairway. Suddenly, Logan come plummeting down the stairs, on a snowboard. He pushes the rich old men and women out of the way as he boards down. On the third step, however, LOGAN is unable to avoid one of the men and crashes right into him, sending both of them tubling down the last three stairs.)

(LOGAN finally opens the door to the President's office. Unannounced, he strolls right in and plops down on the big leather chairs in front of him. The Prez yells some stuff at him but Logan just looks at the crew and shrugs)

LOGAN: Pardon me, but I've come to the consensus that you should shut up and let THE FUTURE tell you exactly why your so-called "Country Club" is completely wrong for me. First off, I don't know if you noticed or not, but there are people all
over your stairs, and they make it really hard to get a nice run with a snowboard. So, you might wanna look into that one, skippy. And that's not all. Your golf course is severely lacking in old men wearing plaid pants for me to torment mercilessly. I mean, look, I'm the CUTTING EDGE in wrestling technology... that's not an easy thing to say and mean. I have a reputation to uphold and sometimes I just gotta relax and kick back and forget that I'm supposed to be the "new Jesus." How am I supposed to do that if I can't even throw stones and golf balls at rich old men?
And you know what else? You wanna know what else I've got a problem with? I've got a problem with the fact that absolutely none of your members, not one, were classy enough to recognize me, the epitome of class, THE FUTURE, the greatest 'rassler' in the history of forever. AND did you know that there were these WOMEN in MY SAUNA!! I mean it was outrageous how they just make themselves at home!! Shouldn't they all be painting their faces and then pandering to our every whim!! You should really look into that you know!? Disgraceful is what it was!! I AM a STAR YOU know!! I mean it is not like I am some hick from....er.......wherever Hicks come form around here!! So I suggest you get your acts together!! Got it?? Good!! And you know what else? I just don't like you.

(Logan pauses and screws up his face in a mock thoughtful look for a bout 2 seconds)

YEAH!! I've given it careful consideration over the last 3 seconds
and the simple fact is you suck!! Your club ain't fit for THE FUTURE!! HMMMMM....Hey while we're in this plush office shouldn't we address this heavyweight tourney thing?

(LOGAN walks over to the Clubs Prez, picks him up and walks him out the door, and goes back and settles in the comfy leather chair)

LOGAN: AHHHHHHHH at last a moment or two by myself to discuss the NACW!! Well BOYS and GIRLS the FUTURE has arrived and already the people are a buzzin!! The new ERA of pro-wrestling has finally reached the NACW, the new ICON has arrived, the FUTURE of the sport is here!! But do I get the matches I so richly deserve just for signing up to this back water fed? OH NO...instead I have to look around at a lacklustre roster and pick a guy out of thin air!! WOOHOO!! Man I hope I get that match, I could use the rest and watching wilson strut his so called stuff, is almost as fun as watching paint dry!! Don't worry boys if I get the match its just because the bookers don't like you too much eh? I mean you get to see your place in the FUTURE of the NACW just before everyone else!! Get the hint boys!! The FUTURE is the point at which the hierarchy in the NACW starts, so get a number and get in line behind the most charismatic, technically skilled and unbelievably CUTE person in sports entertainment!! NACW? PUH-LEASE!! The only thing you hacksare gonna get outta a match with me is the chance to tell your grandkids that you went two or three minutes with the FUTURE!! NACW? Book a little better huh? The fans want to see thier HERO with a real challenge!! And If that is the best the NACW have to offer? Might as well hand over the Big BAD heavyweight Title to me now!!

(Logan flashes his million dollar smirk at the camera, as the doors burst open to reveal a number of uniformed policemen)

LOGAN: Oh hey guys I was JUST finishing!!

COP: We have got a report of a disturbance here?

(Logan discreetly points to the crew, and rolls his eyes)

LOGAN: I tried to stop them officer, but they just wouldn't listen!!

(the cops begin to drag the crew out of the club, Logan leans into the camera...)

LOGAN: NACW!!! The FUTUE is here, the FUTURE is now, and more important than that the FUTURE IS........

(Logan turns to reveal tthe back of his t-shirt: BETTER THAN GOD.....screen turns to static and fades to black)________________________________________________________

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